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The room is small with pale walls, boxes of gloves in holders attached to it, a white board is over the bed with her name written on it and a few other things that I can’t read from where I’m standing. Forcing myself through the door, I wrinkle my nose as the astringent hand sanitizer hits my nostrils. The smell makes me want to run.
My eyes finally stray to the adjustable hospital bed and the small form watching me with tears in her eyes. The sound of people being paged over the intercom and the whoosh of automatic doors slowly fade into the background as I hold Charlotte’s gaze.
The sight of her makes me want to cry like a baby...partly in relief that she’s okay and partly because she’s here in Montana.
63
Charlotte
All the pain of moments ago disappears as my eyes land on Tanner only to
have tears slowly sliding down my face. I search his gaze and realize he’s as overwhelmed at seeing me as I am him. I don’t know what’s going to happen but, right now, I know that he’s here with me. Everything that I’d felt at the wedding...everything in these months between, comes back to me at the very sight of him. I really did care for him.
He moves slowly toward me and drops his hat and jacket to the chair beside my bed before he leans over and searches my face.
I reach up, and cupping his cheek, he closes his eyes and presses against my touch. His large body shudders as he drops his forehead lightly to mine. “Are you hurting anywhere?” he whispers, his blue eyes unmoving from my face.
“I’m a little banged up, but I’m okay. The doctor said I can leave when I’m ready.” My hands grip his arms as he rests them on either side of me, needing to touch him so that I know he really is here with me. That he really is concerned for me. “I was coming to talk to you.”
“When my friend, Bo, called me, I’d hoped I was the reason you were here.” He tries to smile but it slips and he becomes serious. Letting out a loud breath, he presses his lips to my forehead. “I’ve missed you. Everyday, Charlotte.”
“I didn’t imagine the night we spent together, did I? You felt everything I did?” I ask, desperate to hear the answer I need.
“You imagined nothing,” he admits. “I gave you every piece of me, and you still have it.” He brushes my lips with his before knocking his jacket to the floor and dropping into the chair. “God,” he groans. “I can’t believe you’re here.”
I wince as I turn onto my side so I can see him better. He’s still the same man I fell in love with. He fills his jeans out well and he just looks good enough to eat. I let my eyes linger on his face, and admit, “This wasn’t exactly how I wanted to see you again.”
“Although I’d rather it hadn’t landed you in the hospital, I’m happy you’re here.”
“Really?” I ask wanting to believe him and even after his actions spoke that truth, I find it hard to believe. “You stopped messaging me.”
He leans forward and rests his elbows on his thighs while he holds my gaze. “I have commitments here, and talking to you on a daily basis was killing me when I never thought I’d see you again. It hurt like hell stopping, and then when you stopped, it felt like my heart had been ripped out.”
“It was your choice,” I whisper, dropping my gaze. “If you feel the way that I do, then why are you still getting married?” I lift my gaze to his, needing to see his face when he replies.
He stares at the floor, silently, and I don’t think he’s going to answer. When he lifts his head, I see his eyes are rimmed red, showing me how much he’s affected by me. By us.
“You know about Emma, what I kept to myself was that just before I left for your sister’s wedding, I discovered Emma had been fucking a trucker who’d spent a week in town.” He sighs. “You might as well know it all…I left for Lexington wanting to get back at her, except the minute my eyes connected with yours, I knew that you were a hell of a lot more than punishment.” His eyes become intense as he says, “You are everything, Charlotte McKenzie,” in a gravely voice
My eyes fill with tears as I turn my face into the pillow and sob. He’s saying the words I’ve wanted to hear for so long, which set my sobs free, but it’s what he isn’t saying that I heard as well. He’s still getting married.
Tanner moves quickly and sliding his arms beneath me, lifts me against his chest, the sheet coming with us. He sits down on the chair and cradles me close.
“Please don’t cry,” he whispers against my ear, holding me tightly.
I free my arms from the sheet and wrap them around his neck, holding on just as tightly as he’s holding me. “I never thought I’d have your arms around me again.”
“I’ve missed you so damn much. You’re in my head all the time. The feel of your skin against mine. The feel of your lips. The way you feel when I make love to you. The sound of your voice. The way you listened to me. The way you trusted me.” He lets out a shaky breath. “You’ve belonged to me from the minute I walked into Garrett’s house.”
I cup his face in my hands and search his gaze, sighing when he drops his forehead to mine. “This time we’re going to do it right. I need to talk to her because I know with every breath in my body that I can’t marry her when the woman I love is in my arms.”
My heart believes him but I don’t miss the slight wince he tried to cover up. This tells me that it isn’t going to be as easy as we’d like it to be. “I didn’t come here to screw up your life, I just had to know if I imagined everything with you.”
“And did you?”
I shake my head. “It’s still there.”
He smiles and places me back on the bed. “Let’s get you out of here and back to the ranch before the snow hits.”
