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Sliding from her body, I feel the loss the moment I slip free, but ignoring that, I wrap her into my arms and roll her so she’s lying on my chest, her face buried in my neck. “You felt and feel amazing.” I’m not sure why I can’t admit to her that tonight was a first for me too. Not the sex, but in the way I feel being here with her. My release had been far more explosive than anything I’d felt before, and if I’m honest, that scares me.
She lifts her gaze. “Is it always like that?”
I force myself to hold her gaze, and lie, “Yes.”
The smile slowly starts to slip from her face as she searches my eyes before she quickly buries her face into my neck once again.
I’m a bastard for letting her think that I’ve experienced the pleasure that we shared before, but in a way I haven’t lied. In truth, I know loving this woman in the way I have tonight, will always feel this way—only with Sofia.
What I want to tell her is to sleep in my arms and I’ll be here when she wakes, but what actually comes out of my mouth is something I know will hurt her, I just can’t stop. “I need to leave.” I slide out from under her and avoid looking at her while I dress.
At the bedroom door, I can’t resist and turn my head. She’s completely covered with the quilt, and the back of her blonde head is all that is visible. The grip I have on the doorknob keeps me grounded and without another glance, I quickly leave her apartment.
I keep it together until I’m back in my car in the underground lot, and then I grip the steering wheel tightly in my hands while I rest my forehead against it. What the hell have I done? Until Sofia I’ve always shied away from relationships, and now that I’ve found someone I want a relationship with, I’ve ran. Sofia McKenzie scares the heck out of me because she’s the sweetest, sexiest woman I’ve ever met and I want her for myself. The thought of anyone else experiencing what I did tonight with her causes my breath to get stuck in my lungs.
My longing for so much more with Sofia doesn’t make me run back up to her apartment and beg on my knees for forgiveness though. I do the opposite and drive home.
5
Sofia
Leaning closer to the mirror in the bathroom and trying not to poke myself in the eye, I check that any sign of the dark smudges beneath have disappeared.
After Shane had left so abruptly last night my tears had fallen hard and I’d fallen asleep, waking up with a pounding head and the appearance of someone who’d been in a fight. My ankle throbbed, the palms of my hands ached, and the black circles under my eyes made me want to hide for the rest of the day beneath my quilt. I’d thought Shane was different because he’d acted as though he really cared about me. How wrong was I? My first assumption had been correct. He’d just wanted sex and that’s exactly what he’d taken. To me he’d taken a lot more than my body and I’m not sure how I’m supposed to act. I know how I feel and that is used. The one thing I didn’t want to be.
From now on, any interaction with Shane Fletcher with his black eyes, smile of sin, and thighs that make my mouth water, is strictly business. I’m young, but I’m wanting what my cousins have started having—a family of their own.
With my head full of dreams, I slam out of my apartment, hoping I’m left alone to work. I hate interruptions and Shane Fletcher usually finds some way in which to interrupt my day. I’ve probably seen the back of him after last night.
Sighing heavily, I step into the elevator feeling sad and upset because of him. I let him use me and there is no other word for it. I got used for sex. The sad part is that I really like him and my heart flutters in my chest every time he’s close. I’m usually such a good judge of character, but I screwed up this time.
Stepping out of the elevator on the ground floor, I come to a sudden stop when I see the man himself standing at the security desk. Unfortunately, he sees me before I can jump back inside of the elevator, which I look at with longing. The last thing I expected was to find him here. I thought he was done with me.
He strides with confidence wearing a neatly pressed navy blue suit, matched with a white shirt, and pale blue tie. Coming to a stop in front of me his cologne reaches out and teases my senses, reminding me of last night. We’d been skin to skin and he’d touched me in ways no one ever had before.
“I was hoping I’d catch you upstairs. Can we talk?”
“I have work.” Shuffling past him, I hold my head up high and march straight out of the building, ignoring him when he calls my name…until I can’t anymore.
His hand grips my arm, annoyance runs through my blood as I snap my face up to his, a mere breath separating our lips. “You had your fun and left. Anything that needs discussing about your sister’s wedding can be done at the store between office hours.”
His jaw tightens in annoyance. “I should never have left you.” He sighs, releasing his grip. “I’ve never been in a situation like this before.” His hands run through his neatly brushed hair, making it look sexy, as though he’s just gotten out of bed. “I know last night was your first time with a man, and I reacted like an asshole.”
My cheeks heat at his words and I look anywhere but at him. “Let’s just forget it, okay?” I hedge. “Business only, which is where this should have stayed.” I briefly meet his gaze, taking another step back. “I really need to get to work, and I’m sure you have somewhere else you’d rather be, so—” I wave my hands around and quickly dart around him and into a waiting cab.
A quick glance shows Shane standing alone on the sidewalk, watching the retreating cab. Something about the way he watches after the cab gets to me and I feel a tear slip down my face. He looks so alone, and I can’t help wondering what he’d have said to me if I’d given him the chance.
Marissa, the owner of the bakery is in a bright and happy mood as I step foot inside the door. Before I can remove my jacket and put my purse away, she’s linking her arm with mine and ushering me into the large and airy kitchen. I glance around wondering what’s gotten into her when I spot my father, Ruben, leaning up against the newly installed stainless steel double sink.
“He’s been here about ten minutes,” Marissa whispers to me, returning a huge smile to my dad.
I frown at my boss, my eyes widening when I realize she’s flirting with him. My dad in his lazy grace hides his amusement behind a cough. He straightens when I narrow my eyes in his direction.
“How’s Mom?” I snap shaking free of the hold Marissa has on me. I turn my back and get rid of my jacket and purse before I move over to him. My arms go around his waist and I sigh when his arms wrap around me tightly. He kisses the side of my head.
“Your mom is fine.” He turns his eyes on Marissa. “Would it be okay to have five minutes with my daughter?”
“Oh, yes! I’ll go out front.” She disappears quickly, not caring that she’s been dismissed in her own store.
