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“Greg let me in.” He runs his hands through his hair. “But only after I promised not to upset you again.”
Aiden climbs on the bed and helps me move into a more comfortable position. With his hands on me, I want to beg him to hold on and never let go, and that thought alone brings tears to my eyes. I don’t let them fall because I don’t want him to see just how much I’m upset, although if he doesn’t leave soon he’ll probably find out. I just don’t want his sympathy. I want and need a lot more than I think he’s free to give after what I saw at the hospital.
“Damn,” Aiden curses, stands and removes his jacket and shoes before he climbs back onto the bed. “I need to talk, explain…Mateo told me you saw me at the hospital with Rae. I hate that you saw that and jumped to the wrong conclusion.” He runs his hands through his hair and settles on the bed beside me.
He wraps my hand in his and adds, “There was a dick at the bar who wouldn’t leave Rae alone. Diego and Kasey had gone outside the bar to have a look at a friend’s truck that wouldn’t start. Diego went back inside for something and saw that Rae was in a jam. He intervened and the bastard’s friend stabbed him in the shoulder for his trouble.”
Aiden rolls on his side to watch me and brings my hand up to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to my palm. “Diego is going to be okay, but at the hospital it took a lot to calm Rae down. She’s blaming herself for what happened to Diego, plus she was more upset because it was Diego that was injured. You hear what I’m saying, honey.”
He brushes the hair away from the side of my face and wraps a finger around a lock. “I’m saying she
has feelings for Diego.” He frowns. “But for their age difference worrying me, I’d be totally in their corner…Please say something?”
“I’m listening to you, but it’s every turn, Aiden. Whatever is going on in our life, you’re always putting Rae first. Tonight you looked through me and left without one word. I should have been with you at the hospital, but you showed me by your actions that you didn’t want me there.” I sigh. “I know how all this makes me sound, but right now while I’m not at my best, I can’t handle being shoved aside…I shouldn’t have to. You asked me to marry you…and couldn’t even get me a ring without her.”
I sniffle into a Kleenex and continue, “Who takes another woman with them to buy a ring for someone else? I hate that you did that and it ruined everything.” I sigh and wish that Aiden wasn’t lying on the side he is because I can’t turnover and hide.
He hovers over me and drops his forehead to mine. “I’m sorry, Sarah. I screwed up big time and didn’t think. Rae’s sorry too. The last thing I wanted was to screw up asking you to marry me.” Looking sheepish, he adds, “The hospital proposal just popped out. I wasn’t intending to ask you there and then. My plan had been to wine and dine you. Seeing you in the hospital bed made me realize that I didn’t want to wait any longer. I’m sorry I screwed it all up, and I promise to make it up to you when you’re feeling better.”
Aiden is in my heart, but right now I’m not even sure that I want him to make anything up to me. All fight has been knocked out of me and I just want to be left alone to think about what I really want. At one time that had been Aiden, but deep down I know that I don’t want to share him with another woman, and Rae will always be there in his life, or our lives if I move forward with him.
I’m so tired and wish that he’d have left me alone until morning because I don’t have anything positive to offer him right now, and that makes me sad. A tear runs down my cheek, which he captures with a thumb, and then another follows.
“I’m tired, Aiden…so tired that I can’t think right now. Please just leave me to sleep.”
The hurt that crosses his face breaks my heart and I close my eyes to shut the image out. If not I won’t be able to stand my ground anymore.
I hear the click of the light going off so I open my eyes as the room is once again shrouded in darkness.
“Go to sleep, Sarah,” Aiden whispers, exhaustion and hurt clear in his voice. “I’m staying because I have a feeling that if I walk out of that door, you won’t let me back in.”
I can’t speak and let him settle me back down before he settles in to sleep.
AIDEN
Holding Sarah in my arms while she sleeps, I let fear and heartache run from my eyes. I haven’t cried since my mother died but as I squeeze my eyes tightly closed, tears seep between my lashes and run into the scruff covering my face.
Even though I’d hoped, I knew that no apology would make up for all the times I’ve screwed up recently.
I pull her snug against me and bury my face into her shoulder while I whisper, “I love you.” My voice breaks as a shudder works its way through me. “It’s only you, Sarah. I only love you.”
“Aiden?”
Hearing Sarah whisper my name, I freeze and help her turn to face me.
Moonlight filters through the slats of the blinds giving enough light for me to see the tears slowly running down Sarah’s face. I brush the hair back from her cheek and let my fingers linger in a caress.
“I love you, too. That’s why this hurts so much.”
I carefully pull her back into my arms when she snuggles against me. My heart settles with ease and hope, knowing we might make it through this. Her arm slowly wraps around my waist and I stay still to wait and see what she’ll do or say next.
“Can we start again in the morning?” she asks. “I mean take it slow and spend time together, and maybe I could talk to Rae without you around.”
“I’ll tell Rae.” I kiss her on the top of her head and sigh.
Sarah chuckles. “You won’t tell her, Aiden, you’ll ask her. You really do have a few things to learn, don’t you?”
Lots of things are running through my mind, at the forefront is how relieved I am that Sarah seems to be giving me another chance—one I have no intention of screwing up. “Sarah, will you promise me something?” I kiss her sweet lips. “Will you tell when we have an issue? Please don’t keep it inside and let it hurt you. Tell me.” I place a kiss on each eyelid. “I’m hoping everything is good from now on, but I’m a guy and will probably screw up from time to time, but I need you to tell me when I do.”
