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Can't do it. It's part of being in the Talamasca. We never publish outside.
You're afraid you've wasted your life, aren't you?
No. I'm not, really . . . Though what I said earlier is true. I haven't cracked the secrets of the universe. I've never even passed the point I reached in Brazil. Oh, there were shocking revelations afterwards. I remember the first night I read the files on the vampires, how incredulous I was, and then those strange moments when I went down into the vaults and picked through the evidence. But in the end it was like Candomble. I only penetrated so far.
Believe me, I know. David, the world is meant to remain a mystery. If there is any explanation, we are not meant to hit upon it, of that much I'm sure.
I think you're right, he said sadly.
And I think you're more afraid of death than you will admit. You've taken a stubborn tack with me, a moral one, and I don't blame you. Maybe you're old enough and wise enough to really know you don't want to be one of us. But don't go talking about death as if it's going to give you answers. I suspect death is awful. You just stop and there's no more life, and no more chance to know anything at all.
No. I can't agree with you there, Lestat, he said. I simply can't. He was gazing at the tiger again, and then he said, Somebody formed the fearful symmetry, Lestat. Somebody had to. The tiger and the lamb . . . it couldn't have happened all by itself.
I shook my head. More intelligence went into the creation of that old poem, David, than ever went into the creation of the world. You sound like an Episcopalian. But I know what you're saying. I've thought it from tune to time myself. Stupidly simple. There has to be something to all this. There has to be! So many missing pieces. The more you consider it, the more atheists begin to sound like religious fanatics. But I think it's a delusion. It is all process and nothing more.
Missing pieces, Lestat. Of course! Imagine for a moment that I made a robot, a perfect replica of myself. Imagine I gave him all the encyclopedias of information that I could-you know, programmed it into his computer brain. Well, it would only be a matter of time before he'd come to me, and say, David, where's the rest of it The explanation! How did it all start Why did you leave out the explanation for why there was ever a big bang in the first place, or what precisely happened when the minerals and other inert compounds suddenly evolved into organic cells What about the great gap in the fossil record'
I laughed delightedly.
And I'd have to break it to the poor chap, he said, that there was no explanation. That I didn't have the missing pieces.
David, nobody has the missing pieces. Nobody ever will.
Don't be so sure.
That's your hope, then That's why you're reading the Bible You couldn't crack the occult secrets of the universe, and now you've gone back to God?
God is the occult secret of the universe, David said, thoughtfully, almost as if brooding upon it, face very relaxed and almost young. He was staring at the glass in his hand, maybe liking the way the light collected in the crystal. I didn't know. I had to wait for him to speak.
I think the answer might be in Genesis, he said finally, I really do.
David, you amaze me. Talk about missing pieces. Genesis is a bunch of fragments.
Yes, but telling fragments remain to us, Lestat. God created man in His own image and likeness. I suspect that that is the key. Nobody knows what it really means, you know. The Hebrews didn't think God was a man.
And how can it be the key?
God is a creative force, Lestat. And so are we. He told Adam, 'Increase and multiply. ' That's what the first organic cells did, Lestat, increased and multiplied. Not merely changed shape but replicated themselves. God is a creative force. He made the whole universe out of Himself through cell division. That's why the devils are so full of envy-the bad angels, I mean. They are not creative creatures; they have no bodies, no cells, they're spirit. And I suspect it wasn't envy so much as a form of suspicion-that God was making a mistake in making another engine of creativity in Adam, so like Himself. I mean the angels probably felt the physical universe was bad enough, with all the replicating cells, but thinking, talking beings who could increase and multiply They were probably outraged by the whole experiment. That was their sin.
So you're saying God isn't pure spirit.
That's right. God has a body. Always did. The secret of cell-dividing life lies within God. And all living cells have a tiny part of God's spirit in them, Lestat, that's the missing piece as to what makes life happen in the first place, what separates it from nonlife. It's exactly like your vampiric genesis. You told us that the spirit of Amel-one evil entity-infused the bodies of all the vampires . . . Well, men share in the spirit of God in the same way.
Good Lord, David, you're going out of your mind. We're a mutation.
Ah, yes, but you exist in our universe, and your mutation mirrors the mutation that we are. Besides, others have struck upon the same theory. God is the fire, and we are all tiny flames; and when we die, those tiny flames go back into the fire of God. But the important thing is to realize that God Himself is Body and Soul! Absolutely.
Western civilization has been founded upon an inversion. But it is my honest belief that in our daily deeds we know and honor the truth. It is only when we talk religion that we say God is pure spirit and always was and always will be, and that the flesh is evil. The truth is in Genesis, it's there. I'll tell you what the big bang was, Lestat. It was when the cells of God began to divide.
This really is a lovely theory, David. Was God surprised?
No, but the angels were. I'm quite serious. I'll tell you the superstitious part-the religious belief that God is perfect. He's obviously not.
What a relief, I said. It explains so much.
You're laughing at me now. I don't blame you. But you're absolutely right. It explains everything. God has made many mistakes. Many, many mistakes. As surely God Himself knows! And I suspect the angels tried to warn Hun. The Devil became the Devil becau
se he tried to warn God. God is love. But I'm not sure God is absolutely brilliant.
