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Ellie offers me a sympathetic smile. I call out to Tilly that I’ll be back soon, but she’s so engrossed in her cartoons that I’m not even sure she hears me.
The whole drive to the hospital I’m running over in my mind what I’ll say to Heather if she’s there. God, there is so much I want to get off my chest, and none of it is nice.
And then there’s Aiden. I feel so bad about not coming in to see him during these past two weeks because of my fear of running into Heather. I pull into the parking lot of the hospital and find a spot right away. I get out of the car and walk toward the entrance, every step increasing the anxiety that’s racing through my veins.
I pause out front of his room, allowing myself a moment to gather my thoughts. Bright and cheerful, just like always. I can’t remember the last time I was myself around him. No, actually I can. It was exactly three years and forty-eight days ago.
Taking a deep breath, I push open the door. To my relief, he’s alone. I close the door behind me, hoping that I’ve picked just the right moment for me to have fifteen minutes alone with him. I walk over and sit on the chair beside his bed, reaching up to cover his hand with mine.
“Hey baby,” I say, my voice soft.
I listen to the sound of his breathing machines, a sense of sadness hitting me from out of nowhere. How much damage is moving him out of the hospital going to do? I hate him being in pain, but the thought of losing him completely is terrifying.
“Tilly is going well. She’s growing up so fast. Every day I see a little bit of you in her. She has your wit, and your ability to reply to anything with a smart comment.” I grin. I gently stroke his hand—what was once so strong and firm now dry and frail. It’s just another reminder of how much things have changed.
I don’t keep talking. Instead I sit there, reminiscing about our life before all of this. I close my eyes and imagine what he would say if he could speak to me now. After all this time, what would he say? That he loves me, and that he’s glad I waited for him? The familiar pang of guilt tugs at my heart as I wipe away a tear.
The door opens, and I look up and see his doctor, Dr. Arlo.
“Hi Kiara,” he says, giving me a smile. “How’s our man doing?”
“He’s okay,” I say, forcing myself to smile. “You’re the doctor,” I add and he laughs.
“Right. No changes in him, which is good.”
Is it?
He hesitates, his brow furrowing. “Are you aware that Heather has begun the process for discharge? I’ve tried speaking to her about how harmful this could be for him, but she’s convinced she’s doing the right thing.” He shakes his head. “I probably shouldn’t even be telling you this, but Aiden is almost like family to me.”
“I know,” I say quietly. “I appreciate everything you’ve done for him. I wish there was some way I could stop this, but I can’t. I don’t know what to do, to be honest.”
“Just prepare yourself,” he suggests. What does he mean by that? Prepare myself for the worst? I shiver, the coldness in the room suddenly hitting me. It’s like they have the aircon on high.
Before I can ask him anything else, Heather walks in. Her eyebrows rise when she sees me. She walks around to the other side of the bed, nodding at Dr. Arlo as he leaves.
“Hello Kiara. How is he today?”
“The same as always,” I say, my voice hard. “I heard you’re getting ready to take him home.”
“You knew that,” she reminds me. “I’m looking forward to having my son home again,” she adds, stroking his hand lovingly.
“Even if it kills him?” I ask in a harsh tone.
“You think that’s what I’m trying to do? You’re the one who’s life would be easier if he were gone, Kiara. Not me.”
My mouth drops open. I can’t believe she just said that to me.
“You’re going against doctors advice by taking him home and I’m the one hurting him?” I gasp. I stand up and give Aiden a kiss on the cheek. “I love you,” I mumble. Turning my attention back to Heather I narrow my eyes. “Think about what you want for your son, Heather, because if you keep doing what you’re doing, you are going to lose him.”
I leave the hospital a mess. As I head back over for Tilly, I rack my brain for a way to fix all of this. I want her to let Aiden’s suffering end, but not like this. I want her to do it the right way. What makes me angry is she doesn’t see how much she’s going to regret this. As different as we are, the last thing I want is for Heather to spend the rest of her life blaming herself for Aiden dying. That’s exactly what’s going to happen if she goes through with this.
All you can do is voice your opinion and hope she sees sense.
The problem is, my gut tells me she’s not going to until it’s too late.
Chapter Nineteen
Kiara
