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“She’s stable now, I’ll update you when I hear more,” I promised.
I sat in the cafeteria for a few more minutes, waiting for the tears to dry. It was silly, but I didn’t want the nurses, or anyone to notice that I’d been crying, I didn’t need or want anyone feeling sorry for me.
Chapter Fifteen
Simon
I decided not to call mom yet. After telling Cass and Maria, I didn’t think I could deal with another phone call, especially to my mother who I knew was going to be shattered by this news. I knew I couldn’t put it off forever, but I could at least delay calling her until I had a better idea of what was going on. There was nothing she could do right now and telling her would only make her worry. My brother was unreachable. Last time I’d heard from Andrew, he and his family were in Africa doing something for orphaned Gorillas and I was pretty sure they were still there.
Back in her room, Lucy was beginning to prep for Em’s surgery. Standing in the corner of the room I felt as though I was in the way, but every few minutes, Lucy would look up and explain what she was doing and why she was doing it.
“I’m done for the moment, if you want to sit with her,” she said, covering Em up with the sheets. “They won’t be taking her for another hour or so.”
Nodding, I walked over to the chair and sat down. As I held her hand, I reached over and touched her hair, brushing it aside so I could see her face clearly.
“We had to take off her jewelry,” the nurse began, handing me a small bag, “I thought you might want to keep a hold of this until she is well enough to wear it again.” Opening the bag, I pulled out Em’s engagement ring. The diamond sparkled under the harsh lights in the room. A pair of earrings and her necklace then fell out onto my palm. I slid the jewelry back into the bag and into my pocket. The nurse left the room which I felt was completely for my benefit, just in case…I didn’t even want to say it, much less think it. All I knew was how much I loved this woman.
Opening the bag again, I pulled out the necklace and the ring. Threading the necklace through the ring, I placed it around my neck. It just fit, I was lucky Em liked her necklaces to hang low. I wanted that ring as close to my heart as possible.
The machines continued to breathe for her. I tried to imagine they weren’t there and it was only Em and me in the room, that this was one of those times she’d pretend to be asleep until climbed into the bed beside her, wrapping my arms around her body. She wouldn’t crack though, not until I tickled her neck with my kisses. Only then would she start to smile, her laughter filling the room. In the pit of my stomach I felt sick, knowing that was not going to happen now.
I’d been sitting with Em for close to an hour, our fingers interlocked and my head was resting on them. My phone began to vibrate in my pocket. Pulling it out, I saw that it was Cass.
“I’ll be back soon,” I promised, kissing her hand. Armed with my cell, I headed to the waiting room just down from the nurses station. Once there, I called Cass.
“Hey,” I said softly.
“Hi, I got ahold her parents, they’re going to sort out what to do and get back to me,” she explained. “I called her gran too. She will want to come in and see her, can you let me know when she’s out of surgery.”
“Of course. Thanks Cass. I have to go, they’re taking her soon,” I said, my voice breaking. I coughed, trying to cover up my emotion.
Chapter Sixteen
Emma
I feel as though I’m floating.
Not like an out of body experience or anything, it’s more like I am on a small boat in the middle of a storm. I’m drifting in and out of...I didn’t know, what would you call it?
It isn't consciousness, but there are times when I’m aware of everything around me, and times when I’m not and every time I drift back in, I have to figure out once again what day it is and how long I've been gone.
Without my eyes and my voice, my hearing has become more pronounced. I started trying to identify people as they entered the room based on the heaviness of their footsteps. I had an accuracy of about seventy percent, which isn’t that good but its only been a day or two. As footsteps near the room, I try to place them. Too light to be Simon, too slow to be Cass.
My main nurse, Rachel, who I don't care for much, sounds heavier than the evening nurse, Lucy. These footsteps are soft wispy and barely there. As far as I know, Simon has been the only visitor I’ve had so far. This pisses me off a little. What did I have to be like to be considered sick enough for people to visit me in hospital? Unless…
It only just occurs to me that maybe visitors have been restricted to family only. Still, where are my family?
“Hey Emma. How are you today?” It’s Lucy, which means it was night-time, unless she was doing a double shift. Or maybe my whole system of working things out is way off.
Part of what I love about her is she speaks to me like a person. She chats about her family, her boyfriend and her life. Can you imagine being trapped inside yourself, unable to communicate? When you take away the feelings of terror and pain, you're left with boredom. To everyone else, you’re unconscious. You’re left inside your own min
d, which can be a scary thing in itself. Lucy made time pass. For a few minutes, I’m able to feel like this whole thing isn’t happening.
Today Lucy is telling me about her cat, who had put on three pounds, while on a strict veterinary diet. She couldn’t work out how he was putting on weight, until she woke up one night to go to the bathroom and caught him with his head in the cookie jar.
“In the back of the cupboard, I found half a dozen packets of biscuits that had been chewed open and half eaten! I couldn’t believe it!” She chuckles. “Oh hi Simon. I’ve just been telling Emma about my silly cat.”
“Em knows all about silly cats,” Simon laughs, “she has quite possibly the world’s most anti-social cat. In fact, I’ve never met a cat with worse social manners.”
