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I nodded, not able to take my eyes off the little face that was now staring at me. What was she thinking? I leaned down and kissed her on the forehead. The nurse handed me a bottle.
“Do you want to feed her?” she asked. I nodded, taking the bottle. “Just hold it slightly upwards, she will suck on the teat,” she added, as if she sensed my uncertainty. I did as she said, Mirabella latched on quickly, much more confident than I was. I giggled as she slowly emptied the bottle. There was definitely nothing wrong with her appetite.
“I can’t breastfeed, can I?’ I asked suddenly. The nurse shook her head.
“You would have been given medication to dry up your milk supply to prevent infection,” she replied.
“Oh, okay,” I said, cradling her in my arms, smiling at her every little movement.
“I’m going to insist you go back to bed now, Emma,” I nurse said sternly. I nodded, handing Mirabella back to her.
“Uh, where exactly is my room?” I asked, red faced.
“Hold on for a moment,” she said, amused. She came back over with a wheelchair. I started to argue, but she shot me down. “Humor me, Emma. I don’t want you collapsing on the walk back.”
“Fine,” I grumbled, sitting down in the chair. Not that I’d tell her, but I was exhausted. I was secretly glad she was forcing me to ride this thing back. As she wheeled me off, I stared at Mirabella’s crib until I couldn’t see her any longer.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Simon
“Make sure you burp her after you’ve fed her,” Em warned, “and if she cries, check her nappy first.”
“Em. You forget that I’m the one who had done this before, not you,” I chuckled. Em groaned, shaking her head.
“Simon, I’m not convinced of how much you actually did for Maddie when she was a baby.”
“Ouch,” I cried. That was a low blow. Em poked her tongue out at me and giggled. God it was good to see her smiling again.
“You’ll be home with us before you know it, babe,” I added softly. “Oh, I almost forgot,” I said, reaching into my bag. I pulled out the iPad I’d brought for Em. “Thought you might get some use out of this.” She squealed, hugging it to her chest.
“Thank you!” she cried as I laughed.
“We will see you tomorrow, okay?” I asked, leaning in so she could kiss both me and Mirabella goodbye. “Love you,” I murmured.
Claire wasn’t home when I opened the front door. I breathed out, not even realizing that I’d been hoping she was out. I still wasn’t convinced staying here was the best move for me, but something was holding me back from saying no and that scared me.
While Mirabella slept in her stroller, I decided to get a start on dinner. All the ingredients for a stir fry were in the fridge, so I decided to go with that. Just as I was frying the chicken off, I heard the front door open.
“Daddy!” screeched Maddie, running full force into the kitchen.
“Shh,” I whispered, but it was too late. Mirabella began to scream at the top of her lungs. For such a tiny little thing she sure could yell.
“It’s okay Maddie,” I soothed, picking Mirabella up and rocking her. Maddie looked as though she was going to burst into tears. I knelt down and called Maddie over. She walked toward me slowly, her eyes not leaving her little sister.
“She’s so tiny,” she whispered.
“So now you use your inside voice,” I teased her. We both looked up as Claire walked in. She smiled at me, walking over to the stove to rescue the chicken.
“Sorry,” I said sheepishly, “Somebody distracted me,” I added, nodding toward Maddie.
“Go sit down with them,” Claire laughed, waving the spatula. I took both my girls into the living room. Sitting on the sofa with Maddie next to me, I gently eased Mirabella into Maddie’s arms. She stared down with wide eyes, as if she were unable to believe this little person was real.
Mirabella finally fell asleep, not even waking when I placed her in her crib.
God I was wrecked and it was only eight thirty. Either I was getting old or I had forgotten how hard the parenting thing was. Creeping out of the room, I pulled the door over, leaving it open an inch so I could hear if she woke. Back out in the living room, I collapsed onto the couch.
“Here,” Claire smiled, handing me a glass of water. I took it gratefully. “You look exhausted.”
