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“Is it really so horrifying?”
“Maybe not horrifying, but you asking me, your best friend of eighteen years, to kiss you out of the blue? Little bit surprising.”
She gripped her hands in her lap nervously. “Wow. I was just thinking that the two of us have been on edge with each other, and maybe we just need to…satisfy our curiosity.”
He went quiet again and Kelly was frankly relieved that he hadn’t denied their chemistry. Otherwise, she’d have probably jumped out of the car and walked home.
“What are you curious about? Whether I kiss like a thirsty camel? I assure you, I don’t.”
“Why would I want to kiss you if you did?” He didn’t seem to have an answer for her and she snapped, “Are you really that scared to kiss me?”
“I’m not scared! I just don’t want to make it weird.”
She couldn’t believe they were sitting in the Walmart parking lot, arguing about whether they should kiss. “Oh, you mean like avoiding me and acting as though I’m this hideous creature you’ve never thought about kissing?”
“Of course, I’ve thought about kissing you, Kel. I’m a guy and you’re a beautiful woman. But then I tell myself what a bad idea it would be.”
She wanted to press him on why exactly it would be bad, but was afraid of the answer. That even though he was attracted to her and loved her like a friend, she wasn’t what he was looking for.
And that bothered her more than she could say.
“Look, Chris…I have not been out with anyone except a sue-happy man with an anger management problem. And there is a very experienced guy who hasn’t been shy about wanting to take me out, and I’m afraid I’ll embarrass myself if he kisses me.”
Chris’s expression clouded over. “Are you talking about Hank?”
“Yes, I am talking about Hank!”
“I thought you weren’t going to do anything with him because he is a client?”
“Well, I changed my mind! He’s attractive and charming and I deserve to have a little fun!”
“Then what in the hell do you want to kiss me for?”
“What if I’m a bad kisser? It’s been so long, I might have forgotten.”
Chris groaned. “You’re not going to be a bad kisser, Kel.”
“How do you know? I am out of practice and what if I forget to swallow my spit and I drool all over him?”
“So, you want to use me to practice on and drool all over me?” There was no real bite to his words and hope bloomed in her chest. Was he warming to the idea?
Kelly placed her hand on his bicep. “You’re my friend. I know at least if I’m bad, you’ll tell me the truth.”
For a moment, she thought he was going to lean across the seat and do it. His body stiffened, and he shifted ever so slightly towards her, his gaze narrowing.
Instead, he turned away from her and started the truck. Her hand fell away from his arm, the rejection like a slap across the face. When he backed out of the parking space, Kelly sank against her door, tears pricking her gaze. She’d been an idiot to ask. It wasn’t fair to Chris and it was a stupid idea anyway.
The drive back to her place was silent, until Chris flipped on the radio. Alternative rock filled the empty space, and Kelly discreetly wiped at her eyes.
“Are you crying?”
“No,” she said, her voice thick with emotion.
“Ah, hell.”
Chris jerked the truck onto the side of Bucks Bar Road, right above the drop down to the Cosumnes River below. When the truck stopped on the dirt, he shoved
it into park.
