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Freeway Wha?
OMG I was not trying to leave you on a cliffy...
I honestly had to send another email first to talk about the wrong freebie and then it went on so long I realized that it was gonna be too late to send another so I had to wait.
So anyways I didn't get a chance to send about Freeway yesterday either because I had dance class like normal - remember that's how Freeway picked me up in the first place) and then I h
ad to go meet a girlfriend and talk about Freeway and his panties and then also Dodgeball.
Anyways, lets go back and talk about Freeway and his wardrobe incident. When we last left our hero (I guess) he was sitting on my couch and pawing at my boobs and kissing my neck and I was all like oooh and aahhh that feels good and my hands were getting into his pants.
And I got under his pants and then I felt his undies. Except they were women's undies! Lace!
And insult to injury, a pair that I had! OMG!
So, now I'm looking up at Freeway, (oh btw I don't remember every single thing we said so I'm kinda piecing together and improvising at times) but I'm like "Seriously? A thong?"
And what does Freeway do?
He smirks! Like WTF!
He's like, "Sometimes I just want to feel a bit sexy."
Ok, yeah, that would be a good statement. FROM A GIRL!
Don't get me wrong. "I'm not judging, but dude, that is so not turning me on when you say that," I tell him. Like he's free to do whatever he wants. I'm not gonna tell him it's right or wrong. But I mean, if he wants to stick his dick inside of me, I'd prefer he pull it out from a pair of boxer briefs, ya know?
Is that so much to ask for in this day and age? Has dating really gotten to the point where I should give bonus points for wearing gender-correct underwear?
"I'm gonna need a lil bit to process all this, but I don't feel in the mood anymore, Freeway," I tell him and he's like getting up off the couch and standing up. His pants kinda fall and I get a full view of his thick, hard uhm...member? And how it's encased in a thong.
Like...uhmm...no!
I refuse to compromise on this point! I'll compromise on so much! But not on this!
And the way he was looking at me? Like I was being unfair. Sorry I'm not an equal opportunity nookie giver ya know? Like, I have to sorta be turned on. And women's panties, just not doing it for me right now.
Anyways, Freeway texted me once during the weekend. He's all like I can't believe you're being so judgmental. What did it matter what kind of underwear I was wearing on the freeway? Yeah, if I saw a muscled up guy coming up to me on the freeway in a pair of Victoria Secret Very Sexy Lace Thong you can bet I would have put the pedal to the medal and got the F out of there. Just sayin'.
So yesterday I went to go see my friend. We got a bakers dozen of oysters and a bottle of pinot at Hog Island Oyster Company and she told me everything she knows about Dodgeball and I told her about Freeway. You're gonna love this when you hear about Dodgeball too.
Dunno what to do about Freeway. I mean WineBar is clingy and possessive, but at least he wears boxer briefs. Which is apparently the new standard by which I judge men - do they wear appropriate underwear.
Anyways, I'll tell you later what my friend, OysterGirl, and I spoke about. It'll blow your mind.
Hugs and Kisses and Lots of Love,
Alexis Angel
Questions Answered
You need to hear what I found out about Dodgeball...
So my good friend and frenemy that I so love (we used to be sorority sisters) told me so much about Dodgeball, but I'll tell you tomorrow bc I'm heading out but I just wanted to share some of the feedback that I got from you guys as you read the Freeway thong whatever the hell you call it. Incident? Episode?
Anne writes: "The episode "Whale of a Tale" of The New Adventures of Old Christine has TWO guys wearing mongs -- man-thongs. And yes, the women are turned off by this"
Well it's a good thing to know that I'm not the only one!
