Page 23 of Desert Barbarian

James watched his daughter carefully. 'Why do you want to go, darling?'

'It's because of me,' Clare burst out huskily.

'No,' Marie assured her, smiling at her. 'I'd already decided to get a job before I got back from my holiday. I'm tired of doing nothing, tired of drifting. I want to work, to do something. Jess offered me a change of scene, a chance to do something useful, a chance to learn some­thing about myself and the world…'

'But we want you with us,' Clare said shakily, grasp­ing her hand.

James said softly, 'Aren't I enough for you, Clare?'

She looked at him, her blue eyes wide. 'Of course you are!'

'Then let Marie-go. She's right—she has been too sheltered up till now. She needs to find out more about life. I've wrapped her in cotton wool. There's a great big world outside there and she wants to find it for herself. It would be selfish of us to try to keep her. Tom Tit Cottage sounds a paradise to us, but to a young girl such isolation would be very boring. Marie isn't ready to retire from the world yet. Her life is only just beginning.'

Clare sighed. 'Very well, James, I suppose you're right.'

'You know I am,' he said teasingly. 'Weren't you hungry for life at her age? We all have essential stages in our lives. When we're young we need to open out to life. Later on we know what we are and we know what we truly want—then we tend to make our own little place in the world and stay there. Marie has to find her place.'

'I'll always have Tom Tit Cottage to come back to,' Marie pointed out gently.

Clare smiled at her. 'Yes, promise you'll do that, if you ever need us.'

'I'll be back,' Marie promised.

'When does Jess leave?' Clare asked her.

'Next month,' said Marie.

'Then when you've gone to India, Clare and I will take a long cruise to the sun while the cottage is put in order for us,' said James. 'How about the West Indies, Clare?'

'That would be fun,' she agreed. 'But first I must plan the decor and furniture for the cottage.' She gazed at him thoughtfully. 'I think I'll throw all those rooms down­stairs into one huge lounge.'

'Not all of them,' James demurred. 'Keep the little studio as an escape hatch. You never know when you'll need somewhere quiet to be alone. I suggest you make the two main rooms into one…'

Marie tiptoed out and left them to talk it over. She was filled with excited anticipation of her visit to India. This time she would not be living in a luxury hotel behind safe plate glass. This time she would be living among the ordinary people, sharing their daily lives. She must get some books on the little state of Jedhpur. She had barely heard of it.

A few days later she sat poring over a pile of books, learning that Jedhpur was an ancient kingdom in the northern hills of India's continent, ruled over by a dyn­asty of kings descended from a barbaric creature called Jai. The country was mostly mountainous, barren and stony, but there were fertile plains around the river Mas, and it was the Massam Plain which had been turned into a National Park to preserve both animals and countryside from the encroachments of civilisation, and, of course, to attract tourists. There had been some trouble politically over the new park since local farmers had resented the idea, but the King had allowed most of them to continue to farm their land, although it overlapped the area of the park, since they had done so from time immemorial.

The language they spoke in Jedhpur was a dialect, Marie learnt, difficult to comprehend in the rest of the country. English was also used in the capital, Lhalli, for official communications since the King had been to school in England, and some of his subjects had formed a regiment in the British Army before independence.

Clare was with James in the nursing home on one of her daily visits. She had left with an armful of scarlet gladioli, the long sheaves lying against her breast like spears. Together in front of the mirror in the hall, Marie had thought, they looked like sisters. When she told Clare that, her mother had smiled radiantly, the blue eyes childlike with pleasure. Age still held its terrors for Clare, despite her new content.

Mrs Abbot opened the sitting-room door and looked across the room at her. 'I'm just going out to do some shopping. Would you like me to get anything for you?'

'No, thank you,' Marie smiled.

'You'll be in for lunch?'

'Yes.'

'I was going to get lamb chops. Is that all right?'

Marie was surprised. Mrs Abbot rarely consulted her about the menu, despite the myth that Marie ran the household. 'That will be fine,' she said warmly.

Mrs Abbot hesitated. Marie sensed that she was about to ask her something, and looked at her encouragingly. Mrs Abbot took a deep breath. 'Do you think you could take over running the flat if I left? Or do you want me to find someone else to take my place?'

Marie stared at her. 'Are you giving in your notice?'

Mrs Abbot shrugged. 'Things have changed, haven't they? I'm not needed here any more. I thought I'd buy myself a little bungalow down at Southend. I've seen one I like, but I have to make up my mind now, as the owners are in a hurry—they're emigrating, and they want a fast sale.'

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