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There was just one thing she had to know before he left. “If I had said no, would you still have taken my brother’s case?” Was this simply a quid pro quo arrangement? Or would he have helped regardless of her answer?
He didn’t hesitate. “Of course.” He studied her for a few seconds, his gaze probing. “I once told you I would always be there for you. I meant it.”
Ainsley sucked in a breath as a tingle shot down her spine. He’d said those words to her just before he’d moved to New York. At the time, she’d thought he was simply trying to make her feel better, to make it seem that even though he was blowing up her dreams of a future together, he still wanted to be friends.
Apparently, he’d been making a promise.
She nodded, her throat too tight to speak. Damn him! This would have been easier if he’d kept things transactional—a you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours kind of thing. But he had to go and bring up his parting words, stirring up all kinds of emotions she’d thought were long buried.
Santiago’s expression changed, a knowing look entering his eyes. For a second, she thought he was going to come back, to embrace her the way he’d always done in the past when she’d been upset. But he stayed by the door, apparently recognizing it wasn’t his place to comfort her anymore.
He offered her a small nod. “I’ll be in touch.”
Ainsley tried to smile. “Great,” she replied, trying to sound casual. “I’ll clear my schedule starting on Friday for the next week.”
He inclined his head in a nod of acknowledgment. Then he turned and walked out of her office.
Ainsley waited until the door shut behind him before dropping back into her chair. Seeing Santiago again had been challenging—he was still handsome, still charming.
Still her missing piece.
She shook her head, dismissing the romantic notion. She didn’t need anyone to complete her. She was a strong, intelligent woman who had friends and family who loved her and a career she enjoyed. She wasn’t broken or somehow less than simply because she was single.
But there were times when she was lonely.
Once upon a time, Santiago had felt like her other half. He’d been her safe place, the person she went to when she had joys to share or sorrows to grieve. He’d always been there for her, a steadfast, constant presence that she’d thought would always be part of her life. When he’d left, she had mourned as though he’d died. It had taken years, but she’d gotten to the point where she didn’t think of him every day anymore, didn’t feel that hollow ache in the center of her chest whenever something reminded her of him.
Now that she’d seen him again though, she felt bruised. All her hard work, all the time and energy she’d put into moving on—it wasn’t enough. It was like the past five years hadn’t happened, and she was back at square one, feeling raw and vulnerable and exposed all over again.
Playing the part of Santiago’s wife would be a particularly ironic job since he’d left her because he hadn’t wanted to commit. In the weeks after he’d moved, she’d sometimes fantasized about him coming back, metaphorical hat in hand, realizing he’d been wrong to let her go. He’d get down on his knees and beg her to take him back, plead for her forgiveness and grovel for his shortsighted mistake. The fantasy had helped her feel better, even though she’d known it would never happen.
And yet, in a strange twist of fate, he’d returned. Although he hadn’t groveled, he did need her help.
At least this time, she knew the score from the beginning.
“It’s business,” she muttered to herself. “Only a b
usiness arrangement.” No matter how personal it seemed, she had to remember that she was playing a part. Yes, they shared a past. But they didn’t have a future together. She would do this favor for him, he would help her brother, and then they’d part ways and go back to their separate lives.
For a split second, she thought about backing out. Santiago had said he’d still help Ace even if she didn’t help him. Why put herself through the emotional wringer if she didn’t absolutely have to?
But she dismissed the idea with her next breath. If she didn’t help Santiago, she’d feel like she owed him for taking Ace’s case. At least this way, they were balanced. A few days of awkwardness was preferable to being indebted to Santiago.
And maybe in some ways this would be good for her. She’d spent so much time mourning what might have been, she’d lost sight of all the reasons why she and Santiago might not have worked out to begin with. All his annoying traits had faded into the recesses of her memories. Perhaps a reminder of his imperfections and bad habits was just what she needed to realize how lucky she was to still be single.
Ainsley straightened, warming to the thought. It was the perfect approach to take for this upcoming ordeal. Instead of focusing on what she’d lost, she’d think about what she’d avoided and what she had now. Best of all, it would help her keep Santiago at arm’s length, which was what she needed to do for both her heart and the purposes of his ruse. It would be a win-win-win all around. Ace would get the best defense lawyer in the state; Santiago would help his sister; and she would have a renewed appreciation for her life.
She took a deep breath, recalling her interrupted meditation session earlier in the day. Everything would go back to normal soon. She just had to get through this first.
* * *
Friday morning.
“More coffee?”
Santiago glanced up at the waitress, who stood next to the table holding a full carafe. “Yes, please.” He lifted his cup to make it easier for her to pour, then brought the brew to his face to inhale the fragrant steam. Bubba’s Diner wasn’t the fanciest place in town, but the coffee was hot and the pancakes were fluffy.
“You ready to order yet?”
