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“I’m fine.”
“Forgive me if I shouldn’t be saying this, but you don’t sound fine.”
“I—”
He sat up, assessed her more completely. “You don’t look fine, either.”
“Thanks for the compliment,” she said dryly. And why had she thought, for even a second, that she wanted to talk with him?
“That’s not what I meant,” Matt said, frowning. “You look beautiful, of course. But you’ve also got a crease between your brows and you haven’t smiled a genuine smile since I arrived.”
“You’ve been here all of two minutes.”
He didn’t say anything to that. Just sat there, gazing down the steps in front of them.
Phyllis took in a lungful of fresh, soothing air.
“It’s odd, you know,” she said slowly. “In the past few years, I haven’t imagined myself as a mother, having a baby. I’m always the aunt in the picture.”
He glanced at her silently.
“And I was okay with that,” she told him. “I really was happy.”
“I’m sorry to have ruined all that.”
“I thought I was, too. Until today.”
Brows raised, he waited for her to continue.
“I mean, as soon as I knew I was pregnant, I wanted the baby. Don’t get me wrong. I just thought I wanted it because I couldn’t not have it. Because it was mine.”
He looked away, his eyes following a blue SUV as it drove slowly past.
“But suddenly, today, I have to have this baby.”
“I don’t quite understand,” Matt said, his gaze returning to her.
“I mean,” she said, “a great part of my happiness now rests with this baby.”
“How so?” He sounded more curious than anything else.
“Because I’m never going to marry, I assumed that meant I was going to live my life alone.” She shook her head. “I don’t know why I never considered single parenting before now. It’s not like it’s all that uncommon these days. And I’ve got lots of men in my life, friends, to provide a male influence.” She shrugged. “I suppose my background was just too conventional for me to make the leap.”
“I don’t guess there are too many artificial inseminations in Shelter Valley.”
“No.”
She shared a grin with him. “It’s a pretty traditional place.”
“So you aren’t angry about the baby?”
“Hell, no!” Phyllis said, sending him a truly shocked look. “I was never angry.”
“My mother would’ve been furious,” he said.
“It never even entered my mind to be angry. Panicked, yes. Unsettled, nervous, scared, even a little depressed. But not angry.” She thought a moment, and then, “How about you? Are you angry?”
“At myself, maybe, for doing this to you.”
