AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Today, when I saw Ben look at that baby…” Tears filled her eyes again and she glanced away, the room in front of her, out the window on the opposite wall, composing herself with obvious effort. “There was such a wealth of love and commitment in his eyes, you just knew that baby was
going to be safe for as long as he lived. And beyond, too, because he’ll have provided for her.”
“And this makes you sad?” Matt wasn’t getting it. But he was trying. Were these maybe happy tears? He didn’t think he’d ever seen any, so he couldn’t be certain.
“What makes me sad…” She looked back at him, took a deep, shuddering breath. “What makes me so incredibly sad is that my baby isn’t going to have that.”
His chest constricted. Breathing became difficult. She’d slammed him and he hadn’t even seen it coming.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
“YOU SAID YOU WOULDN’T think this was about you.”
Her words were so soft it took a couple of seconds for them to register. He was staring at her, but hadn’t even been seeing her. Hadn’t noticed when her expression had changed from sad to compassionate.
He didn’t need her damned pity.
“How can it not be?” he asked more harshly than he’d intended. “I’m the only person on earth who can play that role for your child.”
“Biologically, maybe, but I could always marry someone else, someone who’d adopt my baby.”
He studied her expression, looking for some sign of insincerity. “You’re thinking of getting married?”
What guy was she going to marry? Would he be good to the kid?
“No, I’m not. And that’s just it,” she continued. “I’ve had a few relationships, even tried marriage once. I’m much happier alone. I know that about myself. And because of it, my baby’s being robbed of something elemental and precious right from the start.”
Matt thought about that. What she said made sense. To a point. Especially when you thought about Ben Sanders and the hospital scene Phyllis had just described.
Still…
“Not necessarily,” he finally said. His elbows resting on his knees, he clasped his hands together, choosing his words carefully.
“In an ideal world, all children would be born to parents like Ben and Tory Sanders, but that doesn’t happen as often as we’d like to think. You, of all people, should know that.”
Her face cleared a bit. “You’re right, of course.”
“The way I figure it, that baby of yours is starting out ahead of the game. He might only have one parent, but she’s going to be the best. That kid’s going to want for nothing.”
She gave a half grin and cocked her head. “You think I’ll be a good mother?”
“The best,” he said again. He’d have given both legs to have had a mother even half as responsible and capable and obviously caring as Phyllis was. “If I ever chose to have a kid, I couldn’t think of anyone who’d make a better mother.”
She laughed. “Well, I guess it’s a good thing I’m the one you used that faulty condom on, then, huh?”
Her smile took his breath away. Her words hurt more then she’d ever know. And he wasn’t even sure why.
Phyllis’s face sobered. “You know, Matt, if I ever chose to have a father for my child, I couldn’t imagine anyone I’d want in that position more than you.”
No! This had to stop. They were standing at the edge of a deadly precipice. And the wind was blowing. Hard. He could hear it, feel it buffeting his body.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said, his voice utterly devoid of warmth. Where he lived, it was rarely warm. And only when he was kidding himself.
She gave him an odd, piercing look. “I do, you know,” she said quietly, “although you seem to feel differently.”
“I know differently.”
“So are you going to tell me why you’ve decided you’re rotten father material?”
