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one in time.”
“How’s that going?”
“Good.”
“But?” he prompts.
Do I need to say this twice in one day? First to my therapist and now to my dad. Maybe I need another opinion. “It’s only been two days and it’s already tempting to ask her to stay forever. It was hard to go to bed last night with her in a different room instead of mine.” I tell him about my issues when I told her she could stay here, which causes Dad to laugh ridiculously at me. “I don’t think we’re quite ready for it, but that doesn’t mean I want it any less.”
Dad clears his throat. “I don’t think you should make any decisions yet. It’s only been two days and y’all are still working things through. She might freak out on you if you ask her now. You don’t want to rush her.”
“Have you been talking to my therapist?”
Dad barks out a laugh. “I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not.”
We talk for a little bit longer, and we hang up just as Brittany returns from the store. She gives me a small smile and heads down the hall. Minutes later, she returns in her pjs, grabbing her plate of food and heating it up before coming to sit next to me, throwing her legs into my lap. She nods toward the TV. “What movie are we watching?”
“I haven’t decided. What are you in the mood for?”
“I don’t care. Thanks for dinner.”
“You’re welcome.” I scroll and scroll before coming across one that sounds good to me: Black Hawk Down. Brittany doesn’t protest, so I take that as a sign that she’s okay with it. We don’t talk as she eats and then curls into me after setting the empty takeout plate on the coffee table. Lily even comes over to sit with us, resting her head in my lap.
“How was your day?” she asks. “I just realized I never asked. Sorry for being crummy tonight.”
“My day was okay. Work was fine and then I had dinner with Ben. Therapy was good. Mood has been shit half the time, but feeling all right since I came home.” The words all flow with ease, and almost without a second thought. Part of my sessions with Mrs. Kirk has been geared to me talking to my dad about my issues as well. I’m completely confused when Brittany stills. “What?”
“You…you just talked to me like we were talking about the weather.”
Ah. She’s stunned. “This is what you wanted,” I remind her.
“Sorry. I guess part of me still wasn’t expecting it.”
“It’s okay.”
She doesn’t reply. It takes a bit for her to relax, but she slowly does. This is still one of the best parts of my day. I have my dog on one side and my girl on the other. It doesn’t get much better than that. Once the movie is over, I notice Brittany has fallen asleep on me.
“Time to go out, Lily,” I say quietly, and she jumps down and runs to her doggie door to go outside and take care of her business. I turn off the TV and then shake Brittany awake. “Time for bed.” She blinks sleepily and covers her yawn with her hand. I get up to lock the door and return to Brittany, holding my hand out. After a moment, she takes it and I pull her up.
“What are we doing?” she asks when I walk past her room.
“Going to my room.”
“Why? I thought—” The words catch in her throat when I turn to face her.
“I want you with me tonight. You don’t have to, but—”
“I want to,” she interrupts, squeezing my hand.
A grin pops onto my face and we continue our route to my bedroom. Our nightly routines are mostly the same. I’m in bed first and happen to notice Brittany giving her wrist a quick squeeze as she walks over and climbs in. Lily jogs into the room and jumps onto the bed as I reach over to turn off the lamp. Brittany seems so far away. Is she lying along the edge or something? I roll onto my side.
“You want to sleep in here, right?” Maybe she doesn’t really.
“Yeah, I do,” she answers.
“Then get over here.”
She laughs. “Oh. Sorry. I got lost in my head and didn’t realize.” Brittany moves into my arms, her legs tangling with mine. Her head bumps into my chin, making us both laugh a little. Her nose brushes mine as she rests her head on the pillow. “Sorry.” I feel her breath and smell the mint scent from it.
