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I drew in a sharp inhale and pressed my lips together. Uncurling my legs, I got up from the couch, and picked up the dishes. The pain in my head magnified tenfold, but it didn’t compare to the pain in my chest. He’s tainted enough. Meaning me. Malcolm thought of me as tainted. I was associated with Seth, always would be; he’d branded me for fuck’s sake. And Shawn. Shawn looked just like his father, no amount of pretending could change that fact. My sweet, innocent boy, tainted by his conception. Malcolm knew. He had to know. Everything, all of it an act.

Malcolm didn’t want us here.

Hands wrapped around my arms. I looked up to see Malcolm, his features drawn.

“Let go.” I yanked free. “Don’t...don’t touch me. I’d hate to taint anything.”

“Shit, Ginger, you know I didn’t mean it like that.”

I pushed past him, rubbing my chest. Hoping I could massage away the constricted feeling that kept tightening within.

“Ginger. Calida. Stop.” He grabbed my wrist, preventing me from leaving. “Stop running and just let me explain.”

I shook my head as I tried to wrestle my arm free, but Malcolm’s grip was ironclad. “There’s nothing to explain. Now, let me go so I can get dressed and free you of my tainted existence.”

“Stop overreacting for just a damn minute please.”

I kept shaking my head. The tears burned in the backs of my eyes, but I refused to cry. I was tired of crying, of being hurt by the words from those that claimed to love me. I should have known better. This was my fault for thinking things could be different. Thinking I could be happy—that I deserved to be happy—had been the biggest lie I’d told myself. I was tainted. I knew it. Malcolm knew it. All of this…Why? Why did he do this? Why did I believe it? I choked on the sob caught in my throat.

I didn't look at him. I couldn’t. Instead, I focused on his hand still firmly wrapped around my wrist.

“Please let me go.” My voice sounded weak, and I hated it.

“Are you going to let me explain?”

“It’s not like I have much of a choice.”

Malcolm released his hold. I immediately brought my arm to my chest, and rubbed the spot he’d held.

“You always have a choice.”

I could hear the sorrow in his tone, but I couldn’t bring myself to look at him. I couldn’t face the absence that would be in his eyes. I could feel the remaining shards of my heart splintering, and if I looked at him, I feared I’d cease to be. My gaze remained on my wrist as I continued to rub away the discomfort.

“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean it like it sounded.”

“I need to get dressed.”

This time when I walked past him, he stepped to the side to let me go.

Chapter 56

Malcolm

I watched Ginger walk up the stairs then heard the door close. No doubt she probably locked it as well.

“Fuck!”

This whole situation exploded out of nowhere. Going from the good time last night, hell even just thirty minutes prior to this. I’d seen the tears glistening in her eyes and felt the impact of that invisible armor being locked around her. How the fuck did one ill-worded sentence unravel all the progress we’d made?

I sat at the bottom of the steps, with head in hands, waiting, listening for the sound of the door opening. I was pissed. Pissed at myself for going way past simply putting my foot in my mouth; I’d shoved the whole damn leg in and half of the other one.

I jumped up when I heard the door. Ginger stopped when she saw me. My heart dropped to my stomach when I saw the suitcase in her hand.

“Are you going to let me leave?”

I detected a faint tremor in her voice. I could see the redness in her eyes.

“Ginger, baby, I’m sorry. Please...please at least hear me out.”

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