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“I’m sorry,” I said hoarsely, “I have no idea what you went through.”
“Yeah, you do.” Jace grinned sadly. “You just weren’t ever given the chance to know your parents. I was, but they didn’t want me around.”
“I didn’t mean that.”
“I know.”
We both knew.
Brian was gone, buried and at rest. He was happy, finally at peace, and the best version of Brian would’ve wanted me to say this. So I looked up and spoke, clearly, “I loved you, Jace.”
Jace met my eyes quickly, a sheen of tears misting over his beautiful eyes.
I added, “I loved Brian and I loved you, but they were different loves. And I’m sorry that I was never brave enough to choose between them. I think I ripped the two of you apart because I just avoided what everyone knew was there. I’m sorry, Jace.”
“I love you too.” It wasn’t past tense and we both knew it.
Jace lifted a hand and brushed a tear away from my cheek. I hadn’t even realized I was crying.
But it broke the dam, that simple soft touch.
Jace drew me against his chest as I sobbed. I let my arms encircle him as I pulled him tighter to me and I felt him bend his forehead to my shoulder. I felt his own tears on my shirt.
He cried right alongside of me.
Jace had made a decision for me a year ago and because of it, everything he’d lived for had been unraveled. And I was in a better place in life. I had a brother and a sister.
I had Tray.
Who would’ve ever thought it? At first glance a rich, shallow, spoiled boy who had morphed into a man who was capable of what most would shudder from thought.
But right now, this was me and Jace. And we were mourning more than just us.
We both loved Brian. We both had intense, dysfunctional relationships with Brian. But we both loved him and only the other could understand what was ripped out of us from the inside.
Brian had been the rebel innocent that both Jace and myself had never been allowed. And he knew it and he hated it because he wanted what Jace and I had. He didn’t want to be innocent, protected. He wanted the respect and power that Jace had carved out and what I demanded from necessity.
But it was all over and done with now. I’d thought before, every time I said goodbye, each of those times had been the last. But I’d always known it wasn’t. I still had ties to Brian, I still had ties to Pedlam, and to Jace.
But this really was it.
Jace was leaving.
“What’s going to happen now?” I asked, against his shoulder.
His arms tightened around me. “I’ll go in Witness Protection and I’ll testify when they need me.”
“Are you in danger?” Déjà vu. I’d asked that so many other times.
And I felt Jace’s cocky answering grin against my hair. “I’m always in danger.”
“Shut up.”
“On it.” He sighed, but still chuckled. He hugged me one last time and murmured, “Don’t ever let Evans get away with anything. The guy needs to be held accountable. That’s your job now.”
“I did it to you and Brian. I can handle my own.”
“I know.” Jace sighed, pulling back slightly. “But I still really hate the guy.”
