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I cried silently that night for all of us, even for Fanny, who was so filled with jealousy and hate that she was willing to destroy herself just to get back at me. I knew that in years to come she would use this new child like a whip, stinging me whenever she could by reminding me whose child it was. My only hope was that it would look so much like Randall Wilcox that the question as to who was the father would be obviously answered. But in my heart I knew it really wouldn't matter anyway. Once I sent that first check to Fanny, she would have her hold over us.
Oh, well, I thought, rationalizing, at least it would all go to family
Family. How strange and ugly that word had become. Perhaps that was the saddest thing of all.
Tony was still in such a daze the next day that he didn't even think much about Logan's sudden return. Logan said he only half listened to anything he told him. In a way it worked out for the better that he had come home, for he accompanied Tony to the Tatterton offices and stores and was able to take over some of the duties Tony was either not able or willing to assume yet.
Every day for the remainder of the week Logan brought me some gift before dinner. I knew he was trying to win his way back into my heart. He brought me flowers and clothing, candy and jewels. He didn't press hard for my forgiveness. He simply gave me his gifts and waited hopefully for a sign or for a warm word.
Finally, one night when he came to the suite after spending the day with Tony, he found me crying. I let him embrace me and kiss me and stroke my hair. I listened to his pleas and his words of love. I let him make eternal promises and beg me for my forgiveness and love. And then I let him kiss me hard on the lips.
I was afraid myself that we would never make love again, or that when we did, it would be so mechanical and impersonal it would mean nothing. But my hunger to be loved and to put aside all the hardship and misery I had experienced was greater than I had realized, and Logan's need to be forgiven was all- consuming. We made love passionately and before it was over, both of us were crying in each other's arms.
"Oh, Heaven," he said. "I'm so sorry I hurt you, so sorry I gave you any pain. I would run through a hall of fire rather than have done this to you."
"Just kiss me and love me and never let me out of your mind again," I whispered breathlessly.
"Never. I'll make you so much a part of me that when you're sick, I'll be sick; when you're tired, be tired. When you laugh, I'll laugh. We'll be like Siamese twins, connected by a love so strong even Cupid will be amazed. I swear it," he said. He kissed me so many times, he made my body tingle and sing. He was so grateful for my love and forgiveness, he made me feel like a princess again, bestowing the gift of life and happiness upon him.
That night we both slept more soundly than either of us had the entire week. In the morning when we went to breakfast, it was as if the pall of mourning had been lifted from the house. Even Tony seemed more alert and eager to begin the day. He and Logan walked about Winnerow again. An old energy and excitement returned. We all decided to leave that afternoon for Winnerow and visit the site. And while we were there, I was going to pay a visit to my sister Fanny
Logan knew that was what I was setting out to do when I left him and Tony at the site Fanny had a contemporary-styled house that sat high on a hillside, directly across from the mountain where the log cabin was. She had built it with the money she had gotten from Mallory, the elderly man she had married and then divorced. He had been paying her alimony all this time. Her two Great Danes came barking around my car as I drove up. She had to come out to put them into their pen before I would get out
of my car. She thought that was very funny.
"They're good watchdogs," she said. "Neva know who's comin' up here, know what I mean, Heaven?"
"Just keep them away from me," I scowled. They looked scraggly and poorly cared for. Fanny never liked animals. She said she kept them only for protection, but even guard dogs needed some love and affection.
"Ain't this a pleasant surprise," she said when I finally got out of my car.
"It's no surprise, Fanny Not to you."
She threw her head back and laughed.
"There shouldn't be no hard feelin's betwixt you and me, Heaven. Sistas got ta stick togetha, don't they?"
"Yes, they do. And sisters don't try to steal husbands, either."
That made her laugh again.
"Ya comin' inside or ain't my home good enuf for ya now?"
Without replying, I walked into her home. She hadn't done much to it since I had been in it last. Her eyes were on me as I looked about.
"Not too fancy, but comfortable," she said. "Maybe now I kin afford ta git some fine, rich things." "What happened to your alimony?"
"Didn'cha hear? Ole Mallory kicked the bucket an' the ingrate left everythin' ta his children. Lot they cared 'bout him, but he was blind ta truth, jus' like most men."
"I see."
"I'm not goin' ta offa ya anythin' ta eat or drink. Ya probably don't think I'm clean enuf now that ya live in a palace an eat offa silva dishes and outta silva bowls."
"I'm not here to pay a social call, Fanny. You know that. You know why I'm here." I sat on the couch and looked at her. No matter how I felt about her, I had to admit that Fanny was an attractive woman. She wore her jet-black hair cut stylishly about her neck and her bright blue eyes were more vibrant and sparkling than ever. Her complexion was as rich and as flawless as I had ever seen it. She saw the way I was looking at her and put her hands on her hips. Her pregnancy didn't show yet, so she still had a perfect hourglass figure.
"They tell me pregnancy makes a woman look healthy," she said. "What d'ya think?"
"You look fine, Fanny. I suppose you're seeing a doctor."
