AllFreeNovel
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In the morning, I stand outside the school gate, wondering what the hell I’m doing, in this city, in this school, in this life. I’m already late for class, and I haven’t opened a book in days.
It feels like I’ve stood there for days, not sure if I wanna go in or run away, maybe this time for good—leave this neighborhood, this family, this city behind and kill this fucking flicker of hope that’s been torturing me—when I see her.
Meeting her again is like watching a sunrise. A fucking sunrise, after days in the dark. A pale gray light seeping through the blackness, turning golden as it spreads, golden and bright and blinding until you can’t breathe from the goddamn beauty of it.
And as I’m struggling to draw air, she glances at me, jerks back and turns around to go, taking all the light with her.
I’m going after her before I know what I’m doing. “Gigi! Wait.”
She doesn’t stop, though she’s shaking her head, her ponytail swinging against her back.
Reaching out, I catch it, and I catch her, too, releasing her the moment she comes to a halt. I look down at my hand. My body doesn’t obey me when it comes to her, much like my mind. I clench it at my side, to keep from touching her again.
“Please, wait,” I whisper. I never thought I’d beg her to talk to me, to wait for me.
Little did I know.
“Jarett...” She sighs, her pretty eyes lifting to my face and then flicking away. “Why aren’t you in class?”
“Why aren’t you?” I counter, and grind my molars because dammit, I don’t wanna fight today, not with her, but the tension inside me is hard to control. “Fuck.”
She shakes her head. “I’m just... I can’t focus. Too much on my mind.”
“Mine, too,” I admit, and it feels good to finally talk to someone, to let it out, even if it’s vague words. “Is it your brother?”
“Merc? No, he’s fine.
Mostly. Anyway, no, I just...” She wrings her hands together.
I reach for them, untwist them, then let them go again, because the feel of her skin on mine burns, and sends bolts of desire straight through me. “Just what?”
“I... I don’t know if I can do this.”
“Do what?” A shaking is starting in my body, in my bones, a spin in the pit of my stomach. The dreaded anniversary has passed, and I’m still alive, but with my foster family falling apart, she’s the only person I can bear having around.
The only person I need.
Breathe, Jarett.
“Do what?” I repeat, more softly. “You said we’re friends. You said you’d teach me how.”
Please, teach me. Please, don’t fucking walk away, too. Don’t disappear from my life like everyone else has before.
Uncertainty flickers in her gaze. It should piss me off—that I’m baring myself to her like I’ve never done with anyone and she still hesitates—but I’m fucking desperate. Something bad’s about to go down, I feel it in the marrow of my bones, and I don’t wanna have to face it alone.
Not this time. Not again.
And not after I’ve been near her, bathed in that warm glow that makes me forget the bad things, that says the future won’t be as bleak as the past.
But I’m already bracing for her rejection, for her to turn around and go. So when she finally speaks, it takes me a moment to process her words.
“Coffee and pancakes?” She’s smiling at me, her smile quiet and small but real, brightening her face.
“Yeah.” My voice is rough, so I try again. “Yeah, sounds good.”
Being with her, even for an hour, even for one morning, sounds fucking awesome.
***
