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Bess had flown down to Aaron’s hometown the minute that she learned about Lynda and she’d stayed with Aaron until I got there the day of the funeral. Then she’d left. It was like we orbited around one another like backward magnets all day. I was honestly glad she was gone.
“Aaron asked me to bring you to the lake,” I admit.
“He did?” She stares up at the ceiling.
“Yes. I think he thought he could fix everything.”
“Are we fixed?”
“Well, you’re no longer acting like you hate my guts,” I say flippantly.
“I told you I’m tired of hating you.”
“I kind of like where we’re at right now.” I close my eyes, and she keeps rubbing my hair. It feels so good to be touched that I think I could stay like this forever and be happy.
“Thirty days, huh?” she muses. Her voice gets even quieter. “Do…do you think he’ll live for thirty days?”
I am silent for a moment. “I’m not sure.”
“He didn’t give me a time frame.”
“I don’t think he has one.” He did tell me that he wouldn’t let Sam ask the doctor how long he had left. He prefers not to know.
I prefer not to know either. Because when it happens, Bess is going to be devastated. No matter how much you prepare for death, even when you know it’s coming, it still hits you like a ton of bricks the moment it happens. And I think it’s going to hit Bess even harder than she can imagine when he’s finally gone.
I just hope her light keeps shining.
37
Bess
Eli and I are sitting on the porch with Kerry-Anne and Miles when Aaron calls to let us know they’re on the way home. He called when their plane landed and informed us that they would be back soon. Aaron sounded tired, but he said in a just a few words that the visit with his mom was a good one, and he would explain more when he got back to Lake Fisher.
Eli sits with Miles in the bouncy seat next to him, and Eli occasionally reaches over and spins the toys that hang in front of Miles’s face. Kerry-Anne is in the yard picking some weedy-looking flowers from the tiny patch of grass in front of the cabin.
“Do you think he’s always this well-behaved?” I ask Eli. I have discovered that as long as Miles is fed, has a clean butt, and isn’t tired, he’s amazingly well-tempered, even to the point that it’s a little off-putting.
“I think he and Kerry-Anne both are on their best behavior. They’re saving up the bad behavior for when they come to live with us permanently.” He spins the toys again, and Miles bats at them, his little fists flying. “By then, we won’t be able to decline.” He calls out to Kerry-Anne, “Bring those here, Kerry-Anne. Let me show you something.”
She walks over with the fistful of flowers. “Can I have these?” he asks her. He holds out his hand. “I want to show you how to make a crown.”
She stares at him for a moment and then hands them over, her gaze wary.
“Many, many years ago, I made Bess fall a little bit in love with me when I gave her a crown made of these funny little weeds,” he explains.
I bite back my smile, but I can’t hold it back when Kerry-Anne looks at him askance. “She fell in love with you over some weeds?” She leans toward me and says very softly, “My daddy says you have to have high standards when it comes to boys.” She holds up one finger. “Expect the best and you’ll get the best.” She sounds so much like Aaron that it makes me laugh. She even does the dad voice he’s famous for.
“He’s right,” Eli agrees. “But sometimes it’s the little things that win them over.” He shows her how to string the stems together by poking a hole in one and threading the other through it, and continuing the process until he has a whole strand of them. “Lean over here, Bess,” he says, and he holds the crown of flowers aloft so he can sink them down onto my hair. I lean over and he lays them on top of my head, and I feel like he just turned me into a queen. Again. He did it all those years ago, and he has now done it again.
“Thank you,” I say with a regal dip of my head, and he goes to help Kerry-Anne pick a few more flowers so he can make one for her too. He has just crowned her when Aaron’s van pulls up. I pick Miles up so we can all go and meet them at the van.
I’m surprised, however, when Sam gets out, slams the door, and stomps into the house instead of speaking to everyone. She slams the cabin door behind her too.
“What’s wrong with Sam?” Kerry-Anne asks as she lets her dad pick her up and hug her.
“It’s a long story,” Aaron says slowly, as he looks in the direction she just went. “You can go check on her if you want,” he says to Kerry-Anne. Then he shakes his head and goes to unload the van. “Nice crown,” he says with a grin. “Eli’s playing the game!” Eli grins at him as he takes Aaron’s carryon and turns to take it into the house.
I transfer Miles over to Aaron, who gladly accepts his weight, kisses his little forehead, and then he follows me over to sit on our porch. “How was the weekend?” he asks. “Kids do okay?” He’d texted me a few times this weekend, but he didn’t check in as much as I’d expected.
