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Chapter Ten
Joseph
“If you’re down here, I’m guessing she’s still asleep,” Marco said as I joined him in the kitchen for breakfast. “You can’t even leave her for five seconds while she’s conscious. You two are kind of nauseating in real life.”
“What do you mean in real life?”
He shrugged. “When I sent people to find you, they took pictures of you together. You looked happy. Then, once you came back home, I saw how you were without her. You were completely fucked up. I thought bringing her here would make you happy again.”
“I am happy,” I said, not really understanding where he was going with this.
He turned the stove off and faced me, abandoning his bacon. His eyes were intent on me, his mouth drawn and serious.
“You’re not being yourself with her. You’re holding back.”
My brows rose. “And how would you know anything about that? Is this about what you said to her last night? I know you scared her again. She was practically shaking when she came downstairs for dinner. You have to stop fucking doing that. Ashlyn isn’t from our world. She’s innocent and gentle, and—”
“She’s definitely innocent,” he cut me off. “That’s why you’re so obsessed with her. You want her innocence.”
“That’s part of it,” I admitted. “I like that she’s not part of our world.”
“That’s not what I mean. You want to take that innocence. You want to corrupt her.”
My fists curled at my sides. “I don’t.”
“Don’t lie, Joseph. I know you better than anyone. You like that she’s so sweet and pure, but you want her to be your dirty little angel, just for you.”
“Fuck off.” I couldn’t hear any more. I couldn’t bear to hear the awful truth I’d been trying to deny. I wanted to shelter Ashlyn from all the ugly things in my life. I wasn’t ashamed of my kinks, but I knew she would be frightened by them. I wouldn’t do that to her.
“She saw my sketches,” he announced, keeping me fixed in his implacable stare.
Anger surged. “You showed those to her?” Marco’s sketches were supposed to be private, something only the two of us knew about.
“No. I found her snooping. She was staring at them, Joseph. She didn’t know I was watching her. Those pretty pink lips were parted, her eyes wide. I could practically see her pulse jumping at her throat.”
“Because she was scared. You scared her.” If Marco was trying to allay my anger, he was only riling it.
“Maybe she was scared. Just a little. Just the right amount. You should have seen her, Joseph. She couldn’t stop staring. And when I showed her the one of the two of you together, she licked her lips and blushed the prettiest shade of pink. I don’t think she even realized it. She wants it, Joseph.”
“She doesn’t,” I countered, even though something tugged in my chest. “She ran down here after. She was holding me so tight, and she was trembling.”
“I like seeing a woman tremble,” he said, his eyes sparking with a rare hint of light. I wasn’t the only one who found Ashlyn’s innocence alluring.
“She doesn’t like you,” I informed him, the words paining me. I hated that she seemed to dislike my best friend so much that she’d seek shelter from him in my arms. “You can’t keep scaring her like this.”
“She wasn’t scared. Not of the drawings and not of me. She was scared of how they made her feel. Stop pretending to be someone you’re not, Joseph. If you really are meant to be together, she’ll accept you as you are. She’ll welcome it.”
“You don’t know her like I do. You didn’t know her in Cambridge. She’s led a charmed life, Marco. I was relieved she wasn’t a virgin. I’d thought she might be when I first met her. That’s how innocent she is.”
“And that’s part of why you want her,” he circled back around to the crux of his argument. “How long do you think you can keep fucking her like this?”
“Like what?”
“Like you’re some vanilla, boring man with a vanilla, boring life. You might not like our violent world, but you do like your toys. You like playing with women, dominating them. You like the control. You know this about yourself. I know this about you. Ashlyn isn’t made of glass. In fact, I’m sure she’s quite flexible. Can’t you imagine what she’d look like, tied up in your ropes?” His voice got rougher as he spoke, his dark words affecting him as much as they were tempting me.
“We can’t,” I forced out. “I can’t. Ashlyn’s not built for that kind of play.”
“I think she is. I think she was made for it. She wouldn’t be so infatuated with you, otherwise. I’ve seen the way she looks at you, the way she reacts when you touch her. Think about it, Joseph. She’s innocent, but you could be the first one to corrupt her.”
