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And then she was gone, in a flurry of smiles and activity, leaving Leo standing alone with Howard. Somehow he got the impression that this had been some kind of plan.
Leo looked around the space, aware that Howard’s gaze was on him. The whole of one side comprised a set of climbing walls, ranging from very easy to what looked like pretty difficult. There was a play area for younger children and thick crash mats were stacked in the corner, ready to transform the area into a safe space where kids could try things out without fear of hurting themselves.
‘This is impressive. How often do you use this place?’
‘Only a couple of times a month in the winter, because of the cost of heating it. We put in a false ceiling, and partitioned the space to make it viable. This area’s about a third of the internal floor area.’
‘It’s a good size, though. And it’s warm enough in here.’
‘Yes, we have infrared heaters and they take the chill off. Once we get twenty or thirty people in here it’s fine for activities. And in the summer we can take the dividing partition down and do more.’
‘What kind of things?’ This was obviously very well thought out.
‘There’s a riding stable close by, and they come and do lessons from time to time. We have a picnic area, and Alex organises family days and different activities. She’s even got an eye on laying a proper running surface, but that’s all pie in the sky at the moment.’
‘At the moment...’ Leo grinned. That sounded expensive but, if he knew anything about Alex, it wouldn’t be pie in the sky for too much longer. She’d find a way.
Howard chuckled. ‘Yes.’
‘Do you get many down from London? It’s a fair drive.’
‘Two, maybe three cars full; the London parents take turns with the driving. There’s local demand as well, and we never have any spare places for our activities. Safety considerations limit how many people we can have here at once.’
‘This must all have taken a while.’
‘Nine years.’ Howard stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jacket, looking around as if suddenly he couldn’t quite believe they’d done it all. ‘We started small. The barn was on some extra land that I’d bought, and surplus to requirements. Alex’s brothers and I built her the first climbing wall, in the summer after she lost her leg.’
A lump formed in Leo’s throat. ‘So this is where it all started?’
‘Yes. The number of times I saw her fall off that damn thing, and then get right back up and try again...’ Howard shrugged. ‘I don’t know where she gets it from. Her mother, probably.’
Leo doubted that was entirely true. He could see the same tough determination in Howard as he saw in Alex, and he couldn’t help liking him. Which made him feel like a fraud for hiding the way he’d failed Alex from her father.
‘I... I met Alex a while ago. At a party.’
‘Yes, she told me. Some fancy dress thing...’
&
nbsp; ‘Yes. It was actually the night before she had her accident.’ This was turning into a confession but it was one he should make. ‘We spent the night...just talking.’
Howard laughed. ‘Alex always did have a lot to say for herself.’
‘I meant...’ He felt like a teenager, telling his date’s father that he respected her and that he wouldn’t dream of doing anything more than holding her hand.
‘I know what you meant. I’m her father, not her gatekeeper. Alex made that very clear to me from a very early age.’ Howard turned as if that was an end to it.
‘I walked her to the bus stop in the morning. I didn’t take her all the way home... I’m sorry.’
Howard nodded, facing him quietly. ‘Do you know what I did? Alex used to call us every Sunday morning. I was busy on the farm and when she didn’t call that day, I didn’t think anything of it. When my wife got the call from the hospital, she had to run across the fields to find me.’
Leo stared at him. There were no words, but Howard seemed to be able to find some.
‘When Alex was born, her mother put her into my arms and I counted her fingers and toes. Then I promised her that I’d always keep her safe.’ Howard leaned towards him. ‘You only found out about the accident recently?’
‘I called her that day, but she didn’t answer. I thought she...’ Leo shrugged. ‘You know. You call, and they’ve thought better of it and don’t answer.’
Howard chuckled. ‘Yeah. I’ve been there a few times too. Look, you can’t blame yourself for something like this. Give it time.’
