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“No. Er, what I mean is, my responsibilities are…” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I told you, I need an heir.”
“But why me, Daniel? Why does it have to be me?”
“I…hold you in high esteem.”
“How touching.”
Daniel winced. Was it possible that she didn’t care for him at all? He could hardly believe it. Their lovemaking had been unlike anything he had ever experienced. They had shared so much else, too. She had to feel something for him, and he intended to find out exactly what. He cleared his throat. “Tell me, Lily. Why did you let me make love to you?”
“We’re not talking about that,” she said. “It has nothing to do with this subject.”
“Maybe it does, and maybe it doesn’t, but I want to know. Why did you stay with me? You were innocent. You knew who and what I was. You knew I would ruin you.”
“Please don’t say you’re marrying me because of some false sense of honor.”
“That isn’t what I’m saying, damn it. I want to know why you let me make love to you.”
“Education and experience,” she said. “Nothing more.”
“Education and experience?” A brick landed in his gut. Was that really all he was to her? “Well, I hope it was all you thought it should be.”
“It was acceptable,” she said, “but it was no reason to marry.”
“All right, Lily. Then there’s another reason.” He set about to hurt her as she had hurt him. “You could be breeding.”
Her beautiful eyes widened. “What?”
“You heard me.”
“But you promised me you would take care of that.” Her dark eyes shone with shock…and terror.
“I didn’t,” he said. “I forgot.”
“You forgot?”
“Yes, it didn’t seem important at the time. You didn’t seem to care. At least, you never mentioned it.”
“Oh!” She clenched her fists, briskly walking to the table where they had shared their small meal the previous evening. She picked up the nearly empty wine bottle and hurled it, barely missing one of her own watercolors. Burgundy liquid dripped down the elegantly papered walls as shards of green glass scattered across Daniel’s oriental rug.
“God forgive me for being so ignorant! I don’t know how to prevent pregnancy. You told me you did. I trusted you!” Tears welled up in her eyes. “I should have broken that over your head!”
Daniel wanted to grab her and pull her to him. To kiss her and give her comfort. Seeing her tears nearly destroyed him.
“I can’t do anything that I wanted to do now,” she sobbed. “I can’t go to the Louvre and paint the Mona Lisa like your mother did. I can’t climb a mountain, I can’t travel to the Orient, and I… Oh, I can’t bear this!” She pulled at her braids, tugging strings of hair loose.
“You can still do all of that.” He strode toward her hesitantly. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go. I always meant that.”
“No,” she cried quietly. “No, I can’t. Not if I’m with child.”
“You won’t be with child forever.”
“It doesn’t matter. I still don’t want to marry. I-I hereby release you from all responsibility for me and my child.”
“Our child, Lily.”
For a moment she seemed to soften, and he went toward her quickly. He put his arms around her and held her head to his shoulder. Her body relaxed, if only a bit, in his arms, one hand touching his hair, the other on his forearm. He held her gently, stroking her back, kissing her hair, saying nothing. After a few moments, she broke away.
“I’m not marrying you. You can’t force me.”
