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‘It is not so very far.’ Perhaps it was for the best, too much had been said tonight to leave unexplored. And perhaps they would kiss again. ‘Ask them.’
He already was, his rare, and very charming, smile deployed to tactical advantage. Mama is already more than resigned to him as a son-in-law. So is Papa.
‘There is a full moon,’ Adam said. ‘And such a beautiful view from the ramparts walk in moonlight. I would like to show Miss Tatton.’
‘Do not let her get chilled,’ Lord Thetford said, the sternness countered by a nod of approval.
‘You have won them over,’ Rose said as Adam swirled her evening cloak around her shoulders and her parents went down the steps to their waiting carriage.
‘I have simply been straightforward with them.’ He tucked her hand under his elbow and flipped one side of his own cloak back so his sword hand was free. Rose did not think he expected footpads in the well-lit elegant streets, it was simply an automatic gesture of readiness that made her heart beat a little faster. She was being protected by a warrior.
‘Your father appreciates that I did not attempt to wriggle out of responsibility and the fact that I have money enough for comfort, if not luxury. Your mother finds me alarming and more than a little shocking, but she is also comforted by the thought that I would put a bullet in anyone who threatened you.’
‘Mama is not so bloodthirsty!’
‘Believe me, she is in the defence of her only daughter. I would not have given a fig for my life if she had been holding a loaded gun when I walked into your drawing room the day you returned home. Wait until you have a child and see if you are not prepared to kill or be killed for her. Giving you a large, fierce mongrel guard dog makes perfect sense to Lady Thetford.’
‘Was your mother so protective of you?’ Was this dangerous ground to stray on to?
‘Lord, yes.’ She could feel him relax beside her. ‘She was a miniature dragon. All this—’ he waved his free hand down the length of his body ‘—is purely my dearest papa. My mother was about five foot three, a pocket Venus with the heart of a tiger. I suspect the only thing that stopped her putting a bullet in the earl was the thought that she’d be abandoning me.’
‘But you joined the army so young,’ Rose protested. How could any woman let a fourteen-year-old boy go off to war?
‘I went when she was at market.’ The tension was back in the long body so close to hers. ‘My grasp of tactics was good even then.’
‘But you saw her again?’ Oh, that poor woman.
‘No.’ There was a long, aching pause. ‘She died the following year giving birth to her husband’s child.’ Another pause. ‘I had thought she was safe once she was married.’
Rose wanted to stop right there and weep. Instead she made her voice as steady as his. ‘When did you hear about it?’
‘A month or so after the funeral. A lad from our village joined up.’
They walked in silence for a few minutes while she fought for some composure.
‘Rose? You are very quiet.’
‘I am trying not to cry.’
‘Over me?’ Adam sounded bemused.
‘Of course over you, you great clothhead.’
‘Other than my mother I do not think anyone has ever wanted to weep over me,’ he said eventually.
‘No heartbroken women?’
‘I do not break hearts,’ he said firmly.
Only mine. I do love him and yet I cannot see behind that facade, she thought as she swallowed the tears he would reject. He would have her believe he was not affected by his upbringing, but she was certain the scars still hurt. Under that tough exterior was the rebellious boy who feared he had abandoned his mother. He called himself her fierce mongrel guard dog. This pretence of a courtship was forcing him to confront the fact of his birth every minute they were in company. If they married, would the whispers ever stop? Mrs Flint? She’s the daughter of a viscount, but he’s baseborn, of course…
It mattered not one whit to her. Adam had made himself a gentleman in every way that mattered, but she feared she would never convince him that was what she believed. And what basis was that for a marriage, where one partner knew he had been trapped and the other had no confidence he could remain faithful to her when all the time he was being punished for gallantry and kindness?
‘Explain love to me,’ Adam said abruptly. ‘Not mother and child, or friendship love. Love between men and women.’
‘I’m not sure I can.’ Rose stopped under a street lamp and tried to see his face.
His shako shadowed his expression, but his voice was faintly mocking when he said, ‘You thought you were in love with Haslam.’
