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“So caveman of you. Don’t let Macy hear you say that.”
I laughed, even though I didn’t feel like laughing. August said whatever was on his mind. Most of the time, I wondered if there was much going on in there since he was often exceedingly quiet. But then he said stuff like that.
“Do you want to talk or some shit? Or just sit there and ruminate on it?” August asked after we didn’t speak for a few minutes.
I so wasn’t the guy who talked things out. I wanted to just do and not discuss. “I’m good with quiet.”
“Works for me.”
The whisper of his brush over wood was hypnotic. My mind evened out and the rage receded back into anger. “Macy thinks I should get back together with my ex for the sake of Dani.”
“Did she hit her head recently?”
I bowed my head with a chuckle. “I’m beginning to wonder.”
“Did you give her reason to think such an idiotic thing?”
That was where I was fucked.
“Silence says yes, sir.”
“I may have had a slightly incognito meeting with Jessica today to talk about our custody issues.”
August whistled. “Not good, man.”
“I was freaking out, that’s my only defense. Regardless of the meeting, Macy should know that I’d never go back to her. That we’re solid.”
Except we’d never said the big words.
I was willing to let Macy hide from putting a real title on what we were just so I wouldn’t have to face her choosing to leave.
“Fuck.”
“Did a lightbulb go on over there?”
“Man, you are a sarcastic son of a bitch today.”
August got to his feet and stretched his back. “I’m always sarcastic. I just usually keep it to myself. You seem to need a little bit of truth sauce today.”
“I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“You wouldn’t be so quick to get angry if that was the truth.”
“She overreacted. Yes, I didn’t tell her about the meeting, but it was only because I was…”
“Worried about yourself? Your kid. Both?”
“Shit.” I slumped back against the bar again. “Yes, mostly about myself. I’ve been so afraid of Jessica taking Dani from me, I haven’t faced any of the shit between me and Macy.”
“Understandable.”
“She’s so goddamn squirmy when it comes to actually admitting she wants to be in a relationship. Wants me, outside of a quick bang. Or a long one.” I exhaled. “I didn’t want to tell her the threat from Jessica was gone in case she decided her duty was done. Why stick around now when we’ve had our fun and I don’t need her anymore? Except I do. So fucking much.”
And I hadn’t even fully realized how much that was holding me back until I’d said it out loud.
“Sounds like you just gotta do the big Hallmark kinda deal. So she can’t say no.”
I folded my arms over my chest. “Hallmark?”
