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I shift in my seat. I should break his stare, but it’s as if he has me hypnotized, and I can’t look away. It’s times like this I wish I could just throw caution to the wind and give him what he wants, what we both want.
“I want you, Parker,” he says huskily.
“I want you too,” I confess. My words seem to break open something inside him. It’s not just me who’s breathing rapidly. His calm and cool demeanor has shifted.
“Have dinner with me?”
“No.”
He tilts his head to the side and studies me. “Why not?”
“I won’t deny the chemistry. It’s almost electric, but that’s not enough.”
“Trust me. I’ll take care of you,” he says, his heated stare causing my girly bits to stand up and take notice. Who am I kidding? They always notice when Holden is involved.
“Probably,” I say, sitting back, causing his hand to drop from my chest.
“There is no probably about it, Parker.”
“We’ll never get to find out.”
“Why? You feel this, you admitted it, and you said you want me. I don’t understand.”
“I need more. I can’t do meaningless. It’s not in me. I won’t say that you don’t commit because I don’t really know you. I do know what I’ve seen and read about you in the past two years since you came on the pro scene, and you’ve never been seen with the same woman twice. I’m not that girl. I’m not going to jump into bed with you no matter how bad I might want to just to say that I did. I want meaning and more than one night.”
“Giving you more than one night isn’t going to be a hardship for me.”
“I want more than sex, Holden. I’m flattered you’ve put in this much effort to pursue me, but trust me, I’m not the fun-loving party girl you’re after. I like quiet nights in and spending time with my family and friends. I’m not about trying to grow my celebrity status.”
“That’s what all of those women are. Most of those dates are arranged by my agent. I don’t sleep with all of them, and I can guarantee you I never had this kind of chemistry with any of them.”
“I’m sorry, Holden.” I wrap up the rest of my sandwich and the bag of chips, placing them back in the deli bag. My stomach is in knots, and I can’t eat another bite. I’ll save it for later for when I’m not in his orbit.
“I’ve never done committed, but I can.”
“I’m sure you can. When you’re ready.”
“What if I’m ready now?”
“Come on, Holden. We both know that’s not the case.”
“Dude! You’re Holden Bailey,” a guy I’ve seen on campus says, walking up to our table. “My buddy said he heard you were hanging out here. Can I have your autograph?” he asks, digging into his backpack for a notebook and pen.
“Nice to meet you,” Holden says, smiling up at him. “However, I’m spending time with my girl right now. We’re just about to leave, so give me five and keep the crowd away, and I’ll take care of that for you.”
The guy is all too eager, and the crowd, well, his loud-ass declaration of who is sitting across from me is the reason there’s a crowd.
Holden turns his attention back to me. “Let me prove it to you.”
“Prove what?”
“That I can be committed.”
“That’s not necessary. Besides, that’s not how this works. You commit to someone when you care about them.”
“Then let me show you I can get to know you. That I can keep my dick in my pants.”
“Do you hear yourself right now? Is this really worth the effort of me falling into bed with you?”
“You said it yourself. You don’t know me. You’re judging me from what you’ve seen in the media. You of all people should know that the media exaggerates.”
I nod because he’s right. I do know that. My parents have dealt with it over the years, and my sister and her husband have as well. Hell, both of them still do at times. The media is always looking for something to twist in their favor to sell magazines and get more subscribers.
“Come on, sweet pea. Let me prove it to you.”
“I don’t want to play this game, Holden.”
“No games.” He holds his hands up in the air. “Just me and you. Getting to know one another. If that leads to more, then it leads to more.”
“I-I don’t know.” I’m torn. Part of me wants to hold strong, and the other part wants to see if the player is finally going beyond the play.
“Give me your number.” He pulls his phone out of his pocket and unlocks the screen before handing it to me. “We can keep in touch. You can take some time to think about it. I don’t want you to avoid your favorite place because you’re afraid of running into me, and I don’t want to not communicate with you for weeks on end. We can start with calls and texts. You control the pace. Just promise that when we walk out of here, you’re not going to ghost me.”
