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Five
My cell rings. I glance at the screen and roll my eyes. It’s JT. O-M-muthafuckin’-G, wasn’t I fuckin’ this niggah like five hours ago? I’m really startin’ to think that this niggah is an escapee from the cuckoo farm. He’s fuckin’ crazy! It’s six o’clock in the goddamn evenin’ and this niggah’s already ringin’ my shit off the hook and textin’ me like we haven’t seen each other in weeks. I swear this niggah’s retarded. And he’s gettin’ on my last goddamn nerve! “Niggah, what? Why the fuck is you blowin’ my phone up like you my man?”
“Take all that tone down, Cass; for real for real ’fore you have me snatch ya ass up. And I ain’t ’preciate that shit you pulled out in the hallway, either.”
“Get over it.”
“Don’t have me fuck you up, yo.”
“Yeah, right, niggah. You ain’t stupid. Try it if you want.”
“Yo, let me stop fuckin’ wit’ you. So what’s good?”
I twist my lips up. “Niggah-boo, don’t play. This pussy and ass is what’s good. You already know. That’s why you keep callin’ me like you a damn fiend. I know Big Booty got you hooked on all this goodness. Now what the hell do you want?”
He laughs. “Yo, whatever. I’m sayin’, though. Why the fuck you ain’t answerin’ ya phone when I hit you up?”
“Niggah-bitch, don’t get it fucked up. I don’t answer to you.”
“Yo, what I tell you about talkin’ to me all reckless and shit? I ain’t ya muhfuckin’ bitch, yo. So watch how you talk.”
“Niggah, fuck you. And I keep tellin’ you to save that shit for ya wife. Speakin’ of her, where is she?”
He sighs. “Yo, Cass, real shit, stop wit’ the bullshit. You pop a lotta shit, ma; for real for real. But she’s out wit’ my lil’ man, shoppin’ or some shit. Why?”
I suck my teeth. “Uh, why the fuck you keep callin’ me like you crazy?”
“Yo, I done told you to fuck all that dumb shit. You already know what it is. I want some more pussy. Why the fuck else you think I’ma be hittin’ you up. Did you count the stack I hit you wit’?”
I roll my eyes. “Yeah, niggah, I counted it.”
“Well, aiight, then. That three grand’s ya retainer to be on-call. I don’t want you fuckin’ no other niggahs, yo. I want that shit all to myself; for real for real.”
I laugh. “Niggah, boom! Not gonna happen. You paid for three grand worth of pussy, ass ’n throat earlier. You want more, you pay more, niggah. I’m not ever gonna be on-call for you or no other niggah, so good luck with that.”
“Yo, real shit, Cass. We both already know what it is wit’ us. You know I fuckin’ dig you, yo. And you know my situation. I ain’t leavin’ my home, yo. But I wanna wife you on da side, yo. So when I call, that’s what it is. I wanna fuck. I can slip out later tonight. So wasssup?”
Yup . . . it’s official. The niggah’s a nut! “Look. Ain’t shit up unless you got more—”
“Mommmmmmmy!” Elijah yells at the top of his lungs, burstin’ into my room. “Joshua won’t help me with my homework.”
“Tell him I said to help you with that work. And don’t come in here with all that damn noise again.”
I hear him yell as he closes my door, “Joshua! Mommy said she’s gonna fuck you up if you don’t get your black ass in here and help me with my homework.”
I shake my head.
“Yo, sounds like you need a dick break. Let me fuck you down real good again wit’ this dick tonight.”
“I—”
This time Joshua bursts into my room. “Yo, Ma, why I always gotta help Elijah with his homework? Why can’t Day’Asia or Marquelle help him sometimes?”
“ ’Cause I told you too, that’s why. Now don’t come in here askin’ me no dumb shit. Get yo’ ass in there and make sure Elijah does his homework right.”
“But, he doesn’t wanna listen.”
“Joshua, I’m on the goddamn phone! Get in there and help your brother and get outta my motherfuckin’ room.”
