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“Sounds good. See you tomorrow. I love you,” I said impulsively as Cooper slid open the door.
“Love you back. Let that hunk of hot manflesh soothe what ails you.”
I smiled at his puzzled expression as he set down the laptop on the table. “I plan on it. Tell my favorite grouch I said hi.”
“Will do. Bye.”
I hung up and did not inquire about what Cooper had found. I did not pretend-pout over the lack of more wine. Instead, I rose and went to the small bit of railing beyond the gravity pool to stare out at the city skyline twinkling in the darkness.
When he came up behind me, I leaned into him. “I came here at almost seventeen with my folks, and I thought I could do anything. Be anything.”
Cooper brushed a kiss over my temple. “And look at you. In a fucking amazing band with all our friends, kicking ass.”
I smiled as I reached up behind me to hook my hand around his neck. “Ricki helped me get in with Jamie and Lindz. She opened that door for me to walk through.”
“That was her on the phone?”
“You didn’t try to listen?”
“Of course not.” I could hear the frown in his voice. “I turned on some music on low inside so I couldn’t. Though I figured it might be her when you said I love you. That’s reserved for just a few.”
Reserved for you too.
She’d thought I was on my way to falling. But the trip was so much shorter when I loved him already.
Had loved him for so long.
This was just a different side to us. Something new and big and overwhelming. All the feelings I’d had for him before were shifting and changing and growing. It was almost like I didn’t have enough room inside for them all.
Riding shotgun with them was fear. Losing him would be like losing everything.
“Throughout these last couple of years, you’ve been always by my side.” I stared out into the dizzying array of lights and lifted my voice above the rising wind. “Am I being greedy?”
He didn’t laugh at me, just nuzzled my jaw. “Stealing happiness wherever you can isn’t being greedy. You deserve as much as anyone else. Hell, I do too.”
Gently, he turned me toward him, his dark eyes dancing with the myriad lights of the city below us. “I’m not going anywhere. No matter what. I’ve been waiting for you.”
My heart literally quivered. I’d never felt that sensation before. “Someone like me?”
His lips twitched. “No, you yourself. From practically the first, it was always you for me.”
I rested my hand over his chest, registering the quick unsteady beat of his heart. Just like mine. “Ricki said you look at me like a bowl of whipped cream.”
“She’s not wrong.”
Heat flared in my eyes, a dangerous precursor. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I wasn’t brave enough.”
I laid my head over my hand on his warm flesh. “You’re the strongest, bravest man I know.”
He released an uneven breath and cupped the base of my head in his hand before pressing a kiss to my hair.
So many unsaid things passed between us in that moment.
Trust. Affection. Even love.
I just didn’t know if it would be the kind that could sustain us, or if we would burn out in a scorching rush. Despite what he said, he couldn’t know either. We just needed to have faith and go forward.
