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“What did you say?”
“A lot of things.” He tightened his hold on her. “The most important was that I want to build a future with you.”
There was no way she could hold back a shiver now. “Why? What is it you see in me that makes me worth all this bullshit?”
“You make me happy. We can make each other happy, if you’ll just listen when I say there’s no one else for me.” He cradled her face in his hands. “And if you’ll let me, I’m willing to spend a lifetime proving that to you.”
Chapter Twelve
Marcia closed her eyes, unsurprised at the wetness that slipped out to seal them shut. Struggling with her anger at Diana was one thing. Dealing with her concern for Cale, another. But hearing the warmth in Tony’s voice when he offered her forever? No one could be that strong, least of all the woman who loved him right back. “You have no idea how much I want that.”
“Tell me.”
“I’m ready to try again, to really try this time. I didn’t before, not even when I was married. It was easier, safer, to keep one eye on the door. That’s what I always did, because if I didn’t care with all of me, no one could break me. I don’t want to break.”
“Neither does Diana.”
His quiet, patient tone ripped the rage from inside her, at herself most of all. “How can you compare us? I’m not like her. I don’t use people like she does. I don’t hide behind my looks and my position and take advantage—” She opened her eyes and shook off her tears with such vehemence they sprayed over his cheeks. But he didn’t step back even when they dripped off his chin, as if he’d taken them on as his own. He didn’t let go.
“What if she loved Spencer?”
Marcia made a sound of disgust. “So she told you.”
“Parts.”
“And of course you’d take her side. Why are you defending her?”
“I’m not.” He rubbed his thumb over her wet cheek. “I’m defending you. Baby, I think you’re fighting yourself most of all. You’re afraid you’re too much like her. You’re punishing her for being as scared as you are right now. For making some really bad fucking decisions, over and over again.”
“I turned on him because of her.” She gripped her elbows. “After the thing with Diana the first time, I turned my back on my own brother because I didn’t want to be associated with their situation. But then when David and I split up, he was there. Spencer never held it against me that I didn’t know how to be a sister, just like I didn’t know how to be a wife. Sex I can do. That I can handle. But anything more? No.” She turned away and closed her eyes again. “I can’t do it,” she whispered.
“You’re wrong.”
“You don’t know the real me.”
“Yes, I do.” His soft certainty curled around her, offering the support she hadn’t had a clue how to ask for. Somehow he always knew. “I know that dragging Diana’s needs through the streets and besmirching her professional reputation won’t make you forgive yourself for what happened before. You want to be a different person, then make a different choice. Let this go. This isn’t about us, sweetheart. This is for Cale and Diana to figure out.” He placed his hand on her back. “We have a lot to think about ourselves. Our own lives to live.”
She wanted to argue. In fact, at least half a dozen replies hovered on the tip of her tongue. One of them stood out from the rest. “She didn’t fuck him over once, she did it twice. And you expect me to walk away? Why should I give her the break she didn’t give my brother?”
Tony didn’t say anything for a moment, then let out a long breath that made her cheeks burn with shame. She must be such a trial to him. “You need to put it in perspective. Spencer’s already ahead of the game. He’s happy with Kelly. He has his own business to run exactly the way he and Kelly see fit. Diana’s alone and she’s trying to keep her head above water in her parents’ store when I know damn well there are certain people who can’t wait to see her fail.”
“You’re asking me to feel sorry for her?”
“No, I’m suggesting—not asking, because it’s not my call or my business—that you show her some compassion. Maybe then you’ll start showing some to yourself.” Gently, he turned her toward him again and cupped her shoulders. “You didn’t see her face today when she realized you were my girlfriend. She’s damn lucky you never noticed it was her at the club, because you probably would’ve pulled her hair out by the root.”
A smile twitched onto her lips. “It’s probably a weave.”
“Touché.” He kissed her forehead while his thumbs circled in distracting loops on her upper arms. “Whatever you want to do, I’ll support you. I’m just saying you have choices. Right now, she doesn’t.”
“She could’ve been a little more circumspect in the first place,” Marcia muttered. “If Little Miss Perfect needed to get her ass blistered, why didn’t she stay the fuck home?”
“I don’t know. Not really my problem.” He didn’t add nor is it yours but she heard it just the same.
Dammit, did he honestly expect her to take the high road here?
She’d been stewing all afternoon about how she’d finally get to skewer Diana. Or at least she had until this evening, when she’d started to—against her will—imagine exactly how it would feel to be outed like that. And think about who else might be affected.
Diana had kids. To the best of Marcia’s knowledge they were older and didn’t live in the area, but just the same. Word traveled. While liking certain flavors of sex was nothing to be ashamed of, it also wasn’t necessarily something the kiddies should be privy to. Or fellow coworkers.
