AllFreeNovel
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“I’m not. It’s not as if it was the dream. I mean, for a while it was—I couldn’t wait to have my own place.” She’d never told anyone this before. Dreams were perhaps the most intimate thing you could share with a person, fragile and easily damaged. “When I was living with my aunt I used to literally dream about it. I felt so lonely, I cheered myself up by imagining a home that was all mine. And it didn’t have to be huge or fancy. I was just excited about having my own place. Filling it with books. Deciding what to put on the walls.”
“And?”
She stared into the darkness. “It never felt the way I imagined it would feel. Having my own place didn’t feel fun or freeing, it felt lonely. I’ve been as lonely in that apartment as I was with my aunt. You probably think that’s pathetic.”
“No. I love your honesty. I love that you don’t feel you have to put on a show for me. You’re a special person, have I told you that lately?” His head was close to hers, his smile so compelling she couldn’t help but smile back.
She could have resisted the broad shoulders and the sexy eyes. She might have been able to ignore his sharp mind and the way he listened and paid attention to small details. But his smile? His smile was lethal, and that was her downfall.
Their heads moved closer together, although she wasn’t sure if she was the one moving or him.
“You’re special, too.” That mouth, she thought. Smiling or serious, he had the most expressive mouth.
He leaned closer. Any closer and they would have been touching. “Do you feel lonely now?”
“No. Not lonely.” A little confused. A lot desperate. But definitely not lonely.
“Taking this slowly is killing me, by the way.” His gaze dropped to her mouth. “I’m trying to assess the chances of Molly wandering in if you sleep in my room.”
“Too risky. Not a good idea.”
He sighed. “Sadly, I know you’re right. It would be a great idea for us, but not so good for my kids.” He brushed away a curl from her cheek. “This can’t be easy for you.”
“It’s fine.” She knew it wasn’t easy for him, either. She wondered if the hardest part was forming a relationship with another woman. She wanted to ask, but knew better than to mention Becca.
Without warning, he captured her face in his hands and kissed her. It was brief and restrained, but no less intense for that. His tension flowed into her and his palms held her firmly as he deepened the kiss.
When he finally broke away she was glad she was sitting down. As it was, she thought it might take her heart and hopes a while to return to earth.
She picked up her glass and took a large swallow.
With a wry smile, he tapped his wineglass against hers. “To us.”
Us.
The word added to the new feeling of intimacy. She wasn’t sure she’d ever really been an “us” before.
No, right now she definitely didn’t feel lonely.
She nursed her glass. “So you’ll go to the lake with your friends this summer??
??
“Honestly? I don’t know.” He finished his wine. “The kids always loved it. They enjoy the fresh air and spending time outdoors. There’s a freedom there that they don’t have here. And Clare and Todd—well, they’re a nice family. I’m sure we’d have a good time, but I don’t want to be away from you for three weeks. Maybe you could come, too.”
“To England?” Was he joking? He had to be joking, surely. “I don’t think so.”
Spend three weeks with Becca’s closest friend?
Awkward didn’t begin to describe it.
On the other hand she didn’t relish the thought of three weeks away from him, either.
“I think it would be great.” He leaned forward, resting his arms on his thighs. “Will you think about it?”
“I’m thinking about it. Even if I could persuade Celia it was a good idea—which I doubt I could—I don’t think it would work.”
“It’s one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever visited. Lake Lodge is set right on the edge of the water in acres of private land. Wait—” He dug his hand in his pocket and pulled out his phone. “I have a photo.” He scrolled and then showed her the screen.
