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‘There were lots of things I wanted to talk about this morning,’ he said quietly.
She’d never seen him like this before. Remote and untouchable. ‘But, Mark—’
‘Forget it, Holly.’ He kept his back to her, his broad shoulders rigid with tension.
‘But this morning—’
‘I just want to forget this morning,’ he muttered, draining his wine in one mouthful. ‘Drop the subject.’
Holly stared at him, feeling as though part of her was dying inside. She just couldn’t seem to reach him. He just wasn’t her Mark any more.
‘What’s happened to us, Mark?’ Her voice was softly questioning, slightly desperate. ‘Can we ever have the same relationship that we had before—?’
‘Before we “had sex”, you mean?’ His short laugh made her flinch and she took a step backwards as he moved towards her. ‘I don’t know, Holly. Frankly, I don’t think so.’
She stared at him numbly.
So that was that.
She’d spoiled everything.
Determined not to cry in front of him, she swallowed down the lump in her throat and wished that she’d never, ever forced him to make love to her. If she hadn’t done that then nothing would have changed between them and they’d still be friends. As it was, by trying to have everything for just one night she’d lost everything for ever.
CHAPTER TEN
‘LETTER for you Holly.’ Caroline handed her a typed envelope and Holly slipped it in her pocket with a quick smile.
‘Thanks.’ She could guess what it was—a response to her application for a practice nurse job several hours’ drive along the coast in Dorset. She’d used the practice address instead of Mark’s home because she didn’t want him picking up her mail. Not that he was likely to try and stop her, she thought, walking slowly towards her treatment room.
It had been several weeks since their night together and he was still avoiding her like the plague. Whenever she entered a room, he left it; he was doing extra on-call to avoid being in the house and he’d nearly always left for work by the time she emerged from her room in the mornings.
Their friendship was in tatters and the knowledge made her ache deep inside. In the past twenty-four years she and Mark had never seriously fallen out about anything—until now.
Closing her door behind her, she pulled the letter open and read it carefully, her heart heavy as she saw that they were offering her an interview a few days later. She ought to be pleased, but all she could think of was that she’d be leaving Mark. She stared at the letter and took a deep breath. What choice did she have? Mark didn’t need her as his fake fiancée and he didn’t seem to need her as a friend any more either.
Without giving herself a chance to change her mind, she dialled through to Ian and asked for the following Thursday off, and then asked Caroline to reallocate her patients for that day. Neither of them asked for an explanation and she didn’t offer one. She needed to sort this out for herself.
Tucking the letter back in her pocket, she called Anna Watts, who was her first patient.
‘You look so much better!’ Brushing aside her problems, Holly’s smile was genuine as she gestured for the young woman to sit down. ‘And Harry looks cheerful, too.’
‘He’s turned over a new leaf,’ Anna told her, dropping her changing bag and all the baby paraphernalia onto the floor. ‘No more screaming at night, and he sleeps all the way through. I feel like a new person frankly.’
‘They do say that colic sometimes resolves itself at three months,’ Holly commented, picking up a toy and playing peek-a-boo with a beaming Harry. ‘He seems very happy now. A different baby.’
‘I can’t believe how much better I feel.’
Noticing the subtle application of make-up and the newly washed hair, Holly had no trouble believing her.
‘Have you been seeing Dr Logan regularly?’
Anna nodded. ‘He wants me to carry on taking the antidepressants for now,’ she said, reaching into her bag for a cloth to wipe Harry’s nose, ‘but after another month or so we’re going to review it.’
‘And how are things with your husband?’
‘Great.’ Anna blushed gently. ‘We managed—you know—and it was fine, and he’s just been offered another job so everything seems to be coming together.’
‘That’s really great news.’ Holly was genuinely pleased. ‘So what can I do for you today?’
