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‘All right.’ Luca nodded slowly. ‘But you need to have some more pain relief first.’
‘Are you kidding?’ Tia managed a wry smile as she got ready to transfer herself into the wheelchair. ‘After labour pains, this is a piece of cake.’
Luca didn’t smile. ‘You know the rule, Tia. You have pain relief before the pain comes back and then it’s easier to control it. You don’t wait until you’re in agony.’
Tia looked at him curiously. ‘Why are you so worried about me being in pain? I’m fine, Luca, honestly.’
Luca let out a sharp breath. ‘It was hell seeing you in so much pain when you were in labour,’ he confessed quietly, and then surprised her by scooping her up easily into his arms and plopping her in the wheelchair as if she weighed nothing. ‘I am very relieved that it is all over.’
She stared up at him, surprised by the strength of his reaction. She hadn’t realised until now just how worried he’d obviously been. ‘Will she be all right, Luca?’
‘Tia, the girl has the entire paediatric department hovering over her,’ he said dryly. ‘Like you, I wish she was tucked up in here with us, but I’m not worried about her. Not at all.’
Tia started to relax for the first time in days. If Luca wasn’t worried maybe there was no need for her to worry either.
She expressed some colostrum in the little room on Special Care and would have spent all day with Lily had Luca not forced her back downstairs to her room for a sleep.
‘You will not help her if you collapse,’ he pointed out roughly as he helped her back onto the bed.
Tia nodded and stifled a yawn, suddenly feeling more weary than she ever had in her life. She’d had a major operation, of course, so it was hardly surprising, and the strain of seeing their tiny daughter lying in an incubator connected to what seemed like hundreds of tubes was beginning to wear her down.
Luca looked as immaculate as ever but she could see from the fine lines around his dark eyes that he, too, was feeling the pressure.
She was all too aware that, despite his own personal worries, he’d concentrated all his attention on supporting her and overseeing the treatment their daughter was receiving. She loved him so much that it was a physical ache in her heart. Maybe it was time to tell him, she thought as sleep clouded her brain. Maybe it didn’t matter that he didn’t love her in the same way.
Tia slept on and off throughout the rest of the day, aware that Luca was dividing his time between her room and the special care baby unit where their daughter was being cared for.
Sharon helped her express more colostrum and then pushed her upstairs in the wheelchair so that she could feed it to Lily down the tube.
‘Weird sort of breastfeeding, I know, sweetheart,’ Tia murmured as she fiddled with the syringe and watched her tiny daughter smack her lips. ‘Hurry up and learn to suck and then we can stop all this messing around.’
‘We’ll still put her to the breast regularly,’ Sharon said, ‘but don’t forget that she’s only tiny and she’ll get tired easily.’
Tia looked at the baby wistfully. ‘Do you think she’ll ever breastfeed properly?’
‘Oh, yes.’ Sharon was adamant. ‘If you really want to, I’m sure you’ll manage it.’
Eventually Tia allowed herself to be wheeled back down to the ward for some more rest.
The next day was frantic with activity and both Dan and Duncan visited her to check that she was doing well physically. Despite the pain nagging in her wound, she was determined to be as mobile as possible to limit the possibility of clots forming in her legs.
Lily’s condition seemed to fluctuate although no one seemed to be concerned that her problems were anything other than something to be expected in a baby of her gestation.
‘When will I be able to take her home?’ Tia asked the paediatric registrar and Julie gave a noncommittal shrug.
‘You know better than anyone that I can’t really answer that. The official answer at this stage is that she could be in until she should have been born—in other words, another six weeks—but I hope it won’t be as long as that.’
Tia sagged with disappointment.
Six weeks?
Six weeks until they could take Lily home and start to be a family?
She spent most of the day with Lily, and Luca joined her periodically, dividing his time between his new family and his busy job.
‘I’ve spoken to Dan and he’s agreed that I can take two weeks off when Lily comes home,’ he told her in a husky voice as they both leaned over the incubator.
Tia smiled up at him. Two weeks together? ‘That’s fantastic. How did you manage to persuade him to let you do that?’
