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‘Thank you.’ Her voice was husky and she still didn’t dare meet his eyes. Neither did she think it worth telling him that, after today, she wouldn’t be seeing him again.
How could she?
It just wasn’t possible. Her life was already more complicated than she would ever have believed possible and so far she hadn’t begun to work out how she was going to unravel it all. And, anyway, he probably wasn’t interested in tomorrow either. Hadn’t he been honest about the fact that he just didn’t want to spend Christmas Day on his own?
‘You ought to eat something. I’ll go and raid the kitchen and then we can sprawl on the sofa and watch agonisingly awful Christmas television. We can spend the afternoon guessing what’s really happening behind the happy families.’
‘Sounds good to me.’
He brought out a selection of food and switched on the television but, in the end, they talked more than they watched and it was dark by the time Miranda glanced at her watch and realised how late it was.
She really ought to be going, she thought reluctantly, but somehow couldn’t find the enthusiasm or motivation necessary to move. And was that surprising? All that awaited her was a cold, cheerless bedroom in an equally cheerless flat. But at least it was cheap, which was the important thing. At the moment she just needed to save her money.
Jake had retreated to the kitchen in search of more food and she flicked idly through the channels, stopping at the picture of a sad-looking child. The narrator informed her in low,
mournful tones that the little girl was just one of many children waiting for adoption who would be without parents this year.
Miranda felt tears prick her eyes and blinked furiously. What on earth was the matter with her? Then she gave a sigh. She knew exactly why she was feeling so emotional, but it didn’t make it any easier to cope with!
Strolling back into the room with a plate full of warm mince pies, Jake deposited them on the nearest table and sat down next to her on the sofa. ‘You look really sad. What’s the matter? Are you crying?’
Horrified at her uncharacteristic lack of control, she summoned up a smile, wishing he hadn’t chosen that precise moment to come back into the room. ‘Of course I’m not crying. Just a bit tired, I think.’ It was a partial truth. ‘Just ignore me. I need to go home and go to bed.’
‘Not until you’ve sampled these gorgeous mince pies. And if you think I’m going to let you go home when you’re upset, you don’t know me. It’s still early. There’s no hurry.’ His expression was concerned. ‘I wish you’d tell me what’s the matter. Is it the whole Christmas thing?’
‘No. I’m just being stupid.’ Despite her best efforts, her eyes filled again. She heard him give a soft curse and then she was pulled into his arms.
He was all hard muscle and masculine strength and for a long, indulgent moment she closed her eyes and allowed herself the luxury of leaning on someone. Just for a moment, she promised herself. What harm could it do?
Then he released her slightly and slipped his fingers under her chin, tilting her face to look at him. ‘You’re very beautiful, do you know that?’ His voice was low and husky and she felt her heart bang hard against her ribs as she stared into those, blue, blue eyes.
Pull away now, Miranda, a voice said inside her head, but she suddenly found that she couldn’t move.
His gaze lingered on hers, dropped to her mouth and then his head lowered.
And he kissed her. Gently at first, his mouth brushing over hers, his gaze holding her trapped. Then he coaxed her lips apart with the tip of his tongue and slid both hands into her hair, holding her head steady while he took the kiss several stages further.
Her eyes drifted shut and suddenly she felt as though she were falling. Her head spun, her body felt suddenly weak and everything inside her was either pounding or fluttering.
Never before, in her entire adult life, had she felt like this.
By the time he finally lifted his head, she couldn’t remember why she’d been crying. She couldn’t remember anything.
‘Oh… You… I should go,’ she muttered in a feeble attempt to regain some sort of control.
‘Stay,’ he breathed, his mouth inches from hers. ‘Stay the night with me and we’ll spend tomorrow together. You don’t need to go.’
Her senses shimmered with awareness and everything weakened. She didn’t want to feel it. She didn’t want to feel anything. Feeling meant vulnerability and vulnerability just meant pain. ‘Work tomorrow. I have to go… home…’ She stumbled over the word because no one in their right mind could really apply that word to a grotty room with damp patches on the walls and a threadbare carpet.
‘Tomorrow,’ he groaned, bringing his mouth against hers again. ‘You can go home tomorrow.’
How had he ever learned to kiss like that? she wondered dreamily as his mouth transported her to a different place entirely. Threadbare carpets and cranky landlords were forgotten as she was enveloped in a sensual cloak of erotic anticipation. Suddenly everything seemed perfect, even though things were about as far from perfect as they could get.
‘Upstairs…’ Jake murmured, tugging at the jumper, and she suddenly froze and shook her head. She couldn’t let him remove the jumper. If he removed the jumper then he’d see—
‘No—really, we can’t.’
‘Why not? You’ve already said that there’s no one at home to worry about you.’ His hands were warm on the bare skin of her back and she pulled away quickly.
