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I grinned and she rolled her eyes.
‘Really? So he’s even hotter than he looks. Way to go.’
I abandoned the comfort eating and slumped back against the sofa. ‘I promised myself I was done with misery.’
‘Sex with him was miserable?’
‘No, it was incredible! But now I can’t stop thinking about him. Crap.’
And it wasn’t just the sex I was thinking about. I kept picturing the way he looked asleep—those lashes shadowing his cheeks, strands of dark hair sliding across his forehead. I thought about the hours we’d spent talking. The things I’d told him. Things I hadn’t told anyone else.
I’d discovered intimacy wasn’t just about getting naked with someone.
Bathed in panic, I sprang to my feet. ‘It was supposed to be just sex. Emotionless sex.’
‘Right. Emotionless sex that lasted five days.’
I paced across the living room and then turned to her, desperate. ‘What am I going to do? I need to forget him straight away and move on.’
‘Is that really what you want?’
‘Absolutely. Definitely. No emotional involvement.’ I didn’t tell her I was worried I was too late for that, but she probably knew because she stared at me for a moment and then sighed.
‘OK, well, the good news is that it isn’t New Year for another six hours, so you haven’t blown your resolution. You can start fresh at one minute past midnight. I’ve got VIP tickets to The Skyline. Tonight we are going to party.’
‘The Skyline?’ It was my turn to stare. ‘How did you manage that? Their New Year’s Eve parties are legendary.’
‘I meet a lot of people at the gym.’ My sister looked smug. ‘We will have a great time and you can forget all about him.’
I knew I wasn’t going to forget all about him.
I wanted to ask if she’d really forgotten He Who Must Not Be Named, but I didn’t dare. ‘Will anyone we know be there?’
‘Yes, a whole group of us and you are going to hold your head up high and wear your favorite black dress because it makes you look fabulous.’
‘Great. Let’s do it.’ I ignored the part of me that just wanted to be back in Nico’s apartment. ‘It will be my first public appearance since I exposed myself (I didn’t count Christmas). Might as well make it high profile.’
I did love my black dress. It had tiny crystals sewn into the fabric and shimmered when it caught the light. I’d found it in a charity shop in Notting Hill, otherwise I never would have been able to afford the label. It was brand new. Still had the tags on it. The owner told me that the woman who had brought it in had fallen in love with it and bought it, intending to slim into it. Fortunately for me, she hadn’t.
Rosie was right. It was the perfect dress for tonight.
I presumed my lack of excitement was caused by the prospect of meeting so many people who had seen me half-naked.
‘We’re going to get ready together like we always do, and while we’re doing that you can tell me everything.’
And because she was my sister and this was what we did, I did tell her everything. How it had felt. How I had felt. And how I felt now, which was totally crap if I was honest.
Getting ready to go out together should have been fun. Rosie opened a bottle of champagne left over from Christmas, but it reminded me so much of being with Nico.
‘Are you nearly ready?’ My sister was wearing a velvet skater dress with mesh at the sides and no back that looked perfect on her toned body. Her blonde hair was loose around her shoulders, a little messy, but that made it all the sexier. She wore a pair of vertiginous heels on the ends of those incredible, kick-boxing legs.
I blinked. ‘Wow.’
‘Wow yourself.’ She eyed me and smiled. ‘I predict emotionless sex will begin at five seconds past midnight. Let’s go. The cab is here.’
I wished I could have felt more excited about the night ahead. It might have been easier had the cab not taken the exact route along the river Nico had taken when he’d driven me to his apartment on Christmas Day.
‘This is where he lives.’
