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“And you had one night stands.”
I nodded. “Yeah. A lot. Having sex was my favourite way of easing the boredom.”
“Why did you stop?”
“I met a guy I really liked. Luke. He didn't feel the same way though. He was using me, but I thought we'd eventually get together so I stopped seeing other people. I turned into one of those idiotic girls who thought great sex equalled love.”
“Did you get together?”
“No. I got pregnant.”
I’d never told anyone that before. Not my friends, not my boyfriends. No one. Maybe Radleigh wasn’t the right person to confess to but he was the first person who’d attempted to delve so far into my past. I couldn’t look at him, but his silence seemed to be asking me to continue so I did.
“When I told him I was pregnant, he said I wasn’t pinning it on him. That I’d slept with so many men the baby could be anyone’s. In the past that was true. But since I met him, he was the only one. I had an abortion, and it made me realise how stupid I’d been.”
I didn’t need to tell him the whole truth. But I wanted to. The memory of it all made tears prick my eyes. Having an abortion had changed everything in the world as I knew it. The disappointment from my parents had crippled me almost as much as my decision to end my pregnancy. I couldn’t have a baby, not at eighteen. I didn’t want to be the girl with the illegitimate child, and I didn’t want any reminders of the way Luke treated me. It was a horrible time in my life, one I never let myself think about. From then on, I never slept with another man before getting to know him first.
Not until I moved to Westberg anyway.
“Wow,” Radleigh said, letting out a breath. “I wasn't expecting that.”
“I'm full of surprises,” I answered with a weak smile. “One of the reasons I'm here in America is because the memories of my hometown are not exactly fond ones.”
“I'm sorry, Leah.”
“Thanks. You know,” I said, thoughtfully, “when I first met you, you reminded me of him a bit. That's probably why I was so tense around you. Maybe I owe you an apology.”
Radleigh shook his head. “You don't. I don't think I'm much like him though. Would he have spent the whole day with you and your family?”
“He would if he thought he’d have sex at the end of it.”
“I wasn't thinking about sex.”
“I know. If I thought you were, I would never have agreed to you being with us today.”
“I'm thinking about sex now though.” He grinned.
“I suppose it was too much to ask that you lasted the whole day.”
“It's still different though. He would have gone out for the day with you for sex. I went out with you and had fun. Sex would just be … a bonus.”
I burst out laughing. “A bonus?”
“Yeah. A bonus. Not an expectation.”
“Radleigh,” I said, with a slight tone of teasing in my voice, “was this an example of you being genuine?”
“Yes. Make the most of it, it doesn't happen very often.”
“I know.”
“I don't like you. You always know when I'm lying.”
“I don't like you either. Way too self-assured.”
He grinned. “Business as usual.”
.
