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I look around the room, trying to make sense of the voices. Nate is here, just as I knew he would be. Jesse. Jackson. Brooke.
Thank god. I’m sure the rest of the boys are here somewhere, probably along with Courtney and Elle.
I squeeze the warm hand in mine and distantly become aware of the pain circling my whole body, but it’s nowhere near as bad as it was during the night. I feel like I can breathe now.
“Tora?” Nate gasps as the room falls into silence, all eyes suddenly on me. “How are you feeling? Do you need anything?”
I scrunch up my face. His loud, insistent voice, pierces into my skull. “I’m ok,” I tell him, tugging on his hand to draw him closer. I look around the faces before coming back to Nate. “What are they all…? What happened?”
The look of complete heartbreak on his face has me desperately trying to think back to what the hell put me here, only I don’t need to think too hard. It comes back like a ton of bricks falling from the sky. My eyes widen and a gasp comes sailing out as I focus my entire being on Nate’s eyes.
Pain flashes in those deep, dark eyes and has me wanting to curse myself for allowing this to happen. The memories hit me like a freight train. Josh’s arm around my neck, pulling tighter and tighter until I couldn’t breathe. Passing out and feeling completely helpless as I had no choice but to surrender myself to that monster. The sharp pinprick as he injected me with something that took away my will to keep fighting.
My breath comes in hard as the more memories that come back to me, the more I want to break down and cry. “It’s ok,” Nate soothes, pushing up and squishing himself down on the bed beside me. I curl into his chest, needing every ounce of closeness I can possibly take from him. “You’re safe. They can’t hurt you anymore.”
“He… They…”
“I know,” he tells me, running his hand down my hair.
I try to breathe through it, but he couldn’t possibly know. He wasn’t there. He didn’t see the way they touched me. He didn’t see the way they ground themselves against me, using my body to get off while I could hardly hold myself up. I couldn’t think. I couldn’t stop them. I had no choice but to wait until it was over.
But I don’t remember it being over. One minute I was in that smoky room with a blur of hands reaching out and stroking my body, grabbing my breasts, my legs, my ass. The next thing I know, I woke up here.
Tears begin cascading down my cheeks and soak into his shirt. “How… how far did it go?”
A voice clears and we both look up at Jesse. “We’ll wait outside while you guys talk,” he murmurs into the too quiet room before locking eyes on me with a heartbroken smile. “It’s good to see you awake,” he tells me. “You had me worried.”
I give him a small smile, not really feeling like giving away anything bigger than that. I watch as he leads the way out the door with Jackson falling in behind him. Brooke looks at me. “I’ll be just outside if you need to… you know, talk about it.”
I nod as she slips out the door before gently closing it behind her, leaving me in the arms of the man who looks like he wants nothing more than to drown in a pool of his own sorrows. “I’m so sorry,” he tells me with his heart on his sleeve.
My tears don’t dry up for even a second. “Nate,” I beg as the unknown becomes too much for me to bear. “Tell me. How far did it go?”
He lets out a sigh and I swear, it’s the closest I’ve ever seen him to breaking down. “I got there in time, but had I been even a few minutes later… I don’t know.”
“They didn’t…?”
“No, but they were going to. They would have if we didn’t get there.”
“I know.”
“You remember it?” he questions.
“Bits and pieces,” I tell him. “I remember being in that room. There was a lot of smoke and it was hard to breathe. I don’t know, I thought there were maybe fifteen guys, but everything was blurry. I couldn’t stand and I couldn’t scream, and then Josh just…” I bring my hands up and cover my face, completely ashamed with myself. “He… he pushed me into that room and told them I wanted it. I couldn’t make them stop.”
“It’s ok,” he tells me, holding me tighter. “It’s not your fault. He drugged you. He gave you GHB and overdosed you with it.”
“What?” I mumble into his shirt.
“It’s a date rape drug, usually guys slip it into your drink, but he injected it straight into your system. You didn’t stand a chance. This isn’t your fault. It’s on Josh and he’s going to pay for what he did. I promise you that.” I nod my head, fully trusting him to do whatever it is he needs to do to make that happen. “After I got you out,” he tells me, “Jesse and the boys stayed up all night searching for him.”
