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Chapter Two – I Almost Feel Guilty

I truly hadn’t realised how badly Radleigh and I had needed some time to ourselves, and when we arrived at his parents’ house in the morning, I felt revived and refreshed. I wasn’t even tired since we’d had the chance for a lie-in, and my relaxation time wasn’t over just yet. Radleigh would be taking care of Jessica while I went out to lunch and then wedding dress shopping with Freya and Bree.

Maybe Radleigh was right. Maybe we should allow ourselves a child-free night now and again. I just hated the idea of palming our daughter off on other people just so we could have some time alone. Becoming a parent came with responsibilities; this was one of the main reasons I didn’t get a job after Jessica was born. I knew Radleigh had had a childhood of either being left with his grandparents, a sitter, or being taken on the road with his dad. I wanted Jessica to have more stability right from the start. To not think that constant travelling and limited time with her parents was normal. I wanted her to know who we were, and more than that, I didn’t want to miss out on anything with her. I had the greatest of respect for working parents, because really, they had twice the work to deal with. But I didn’t want that. I wanted all my focus to be on my daughter.

“Good morning!” Deanna McCoy greeted us brightly as she ushered us inside.

As always, Radleigh’s mum was smartly dressed, her blonde hair pinned back in an elegant bun even though she was doing nothing more than hanging out at home. I smiled as we entered the grand hallway, which was much like our own. I could hear Jessica’s giggles coming from the living room and my heart leapt at the sound.

“Morning,” I said, giving Deanna hug. “How’s my girl doing?”

“She’s great.” As she released me, Radleigh leaned down to hug her too.

“Thanks for taking care of her last night,” I said as we followed the sound of laughter towards the living room. Radleigh rested his hand on my shoulder and I looked around to smile at him. His grin made me want to leave Jessica for another couple of hours and take Radleigh home again, but “grown-up time” was over for a while.

“It was our pleasure,” Deanna said. “Did you two have a good evening?”

Radleigh’s hands slid from my shoulders down my arms then he circled his arms around my waist from behind, making me smile again. “We did. Dinner was great and… dessert was even better.”

My cheeks burned and I shoved my elbow sharply into Radleigh’s ribs, though I couldn’t help laughing. “Too much information.”

Deanna chuckled, and as we entered the living room, my heart leapt again and my embarrassment vanished. Mitch McCoy was laying on his back on the huge shaggy rug on the floor, holding Jessica at arm’s length in the air before slowly lowering her down then lifting her back up. He laughed at her giggles of glee, and a feeling of warmth swept through me at how incredibly fortunate I was to have such a strong family around me.

“Looks like Mommy and Daddy are here!” Mitch lowered Jessica down again then carefully sat up and faced us. Jessica’s ice blue eyes lit up further as she saw Radleigh and me, and she stretched her arms out towards us.

“Hi, beautiful.” I lifted Jessica into my arms and kissed the top of her head as sh

e snuggled into me. I closed my eyes, relishing the moment. As I opened them again, I smiled down at my father-in-law-to-be then back to Jessica. “Have you been a good girl?”

“She has,” Mitch confirmed, standing up. He leaned in to kiss me, then Jessica, on the cheek. “Did you two have fun?”

“Oh, they had fun,” Deanna said. “Apparently dessert was particularly good.” She winked at me and I felt myself blushing again.

Mitch let out a hearty laugh. “That’s my boy!”

Shaking my head, I lightly pressed my forehead against Jessica’s. “Boys, eh?”

She wrinkled her nose up at me, almost as if she understood, and Deanna and I burst out laughing at her expression.

“Enough with the dirty talk,” Radleigh said. “You’re corrupting my daughter.”

Frankly, with us as her parents, she’s probably half way there already. I kept that thought firmly inside my own head, but snorted out a small laugh. I planned to make damn sure Jessica didn’t make nearly as many mistakes as Radleigh and I did… but that time was a long way away.

Plus, Radleigh had already made it clear she wouldn’t be allowed to date until she was thirty. At least.

I handed Jessica to him and she beamed; such a Daddy’s girl. Radleigh pressed the tip of his nose lightly against hers then kissed her cheek. “Missed you.”

Jessica put her little arms around his neck and I smiled.

Yup. This was my life.

Since Jessica’s arrival, everything was different. Parenthood was a strange and wonderful thing; a thing that could have made or broken Radleigh and me. My pregnancy happened so fast we’d barely figured out who we were as a couple, or whether we really could settle into a real, functional relationship after the dysfunction that plagued our every move when we first met. Nothing about our relationship had been conventional right from the start, but throwing a baby into the mix was something neither of us had imagined. Maybe it shouldn’t have been so easy, but from the second Jessica was placed in my arms, it suddenly felt like something I’d been missing had returned to me. Or maybe not returned, but certainly gifted. Jessica was the best gift ever. Family life had sort of fallen into place, and while there was every possibility that the addition of a baby – not to mention planning a wedding – would put extra strain on our relationship, Radleigh and I had become closer than ever. We’d fallen into a perfect stride, and I knew immediately that I’d made the right decision when I moved back to L.A. He and I would never be the couple who had sickly pet names for each other, but we would be the couple who always kept the fire in our relationship. We could still fight like enemies, but we made up like best friends. Our fights weren’t about point-scoring anymore. They weren’t petty. But what we’d learned to do was cool off and talk things through. It’s a basic, obvious thing to do after an argument, but in the past, when we’d gotten so angry we could barely see straight, that logical step hadn’t occurred to us. That was how we’d got into such a mess. Now that mess was over. We’d gotten past it to somewhere better. We were a family, and I couldn’t wait until we made it official in the summer.

“Leah?”

Radleigh’s voice shook me from my thoughts and I looked up at him. “Sorry. What did you say?”

He smiled. “I said we should leave soon or you’ll be late.”

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