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“Was it hard? All those years in foster care?” She gave her head a shake. “Stupid question. I’m sure it was hard.”

“It was more than hard.”

“Do you want to talk about it? You don’t have to.”

I nearly said no and then realized that I wanted to. I felt close to Shiloh and I wanted to keep feeling that way.

“Some of the placements were okay. Some were not.”

“Were you moved around a lot?”

“Thirteen homes in ten years.”

“God.” She squeezed my hand. “I don’t understand how people can do that. Take a kid in and then kick them out again.”

“Some people do it for the money. Those are the worst. The good ones are rare, and only so many are looking to adopt. Thanks to my history, I wasn’t a good candidate.”

“Then your uncle found you?”

I looked straight ahead. “Yeah. But I’d already turned eighteen.”

“Bad timing.”

To say the least.

“But you’re with him now,” she said. “That’s a good thing, I hope.”

That was the time to tell her the truth, that I lived alone. But I liked feeling like a normal person too much to wreck it just yet.

“He’s okay,” I said. “But yeah, it’s good to have family. Even if it’s just one person.”

Shiloh nodded as we waited at a light to cross the street. Only a few cars were out; the town was sleepy.

“I feel the same. I love my aunt and uncle, and my cousin, Letitia, is the best, but I got lucky with Bibi. She’s my person. When my mom decided she didn’t want me anymore, Bibi was there.”

“How old were you?”

“Four. Old enough to remember crying when she dropped me off at Bibi’s house. Old enough to remember feeling like I’d done something wrong.” Her voice grew thick again. “I remember that.”

“Why did she wait until you were four?” I asked after a minute.

“I don’t know. I guess she was trying to be my mom, but she couldn’t do it.”

“I’m sorry, Shiloh.”

She smiled tightly. “It’s fine. I mean, it’s not fine but it’s what happened. And when bad shit happens, we figure out how to cope, right?”

I nodded, thinking of night walks and watching bonfires burn.

“My brilliant solution to deal with her rejection was to keep to myself. I figured if people didn’t get to know me—including my best friend—they wouldn’t have any cause to get rid of me.” She glanced up at me. “These are all new revelations, by the way. And do you know when they began to arrive?”

“No.”

“Roughly the exact instant I met you.”

“Is that good or bad?”

“Both,” she said and resumed walking. “Kind of pathetic, isn’t it? But I can’t help it. She’s my mom. She’s supposed to love me. It’s in the contract.”

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