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Connor nodded. “I will. Because I am.”
“Good, because I’m not doing that again.”
“Why not? It worked perfectly.”
“It’s dishonest,” I said. “Autumn’s already been burned hard by dishonesty. If she finds out, she’ll never talk to either of us again.”
“It’s not all that dishonest.” Connor got up and grabbed his wallet and keys from the front table. “You just wrote what I was thinking but couldn’t say.”
No, I wrote what I was thinking and can never say.
“You’re on your own now, Drake.” I gave my shoelace a jerk and grabbed my phone and earbuds. “I’m going for a run.”
“Okay,” Connor said, sounding bewildered. “Hey, man. Thanks.”
I found a faint smile. “Don’t make her wait.”
I ran all the way down Pleasant Drive, past the shops and cafés of the small town. It was quiet for a Saturday night, and my thoughts were loud. I put on a radio app that tuned into the Amherst station. Over the eclectic mix of songs, I played my mantra:
Forget her.
Get over it.
Move on.
I ran to the end of town, where the lights gave way to dark swaths of uninhabited land. I stared out at the black nothing, turned around and headed back. The DJ in my ear announced the next song.
“Here’s ‘Ocean Eyes’ from the sixteen-year-old prodigy, Billie Eilish.”
I froze, hands on hips, listening and breathing hard as a young woman sang about a man she’d been watching from afar. How she fell into the depths of his eyes and his diamond mind.
I tore the earbuds out and paced a small circle, anger burning a hole in my chest.
“It’s me,” I said to the night. “It’s fucking me. Not him.”
I sucked in a deep breath. I had to tell Connor I had a connection with Autumn I couldn’t explain and if I didn’t admit it out loud, it’d burn me up from the inside.
I started to jog back to town, then ran. Hard. Another race, only this one meant more than anything I’d done on the track last weekend. I raced to Connor, to tell him the truth, and maybe he’d understand.
Or maybe he’d tell me I was too late…
I was too late.
From across the street, I saw them sitting at a tiny table at Claire’s Café, leaning into each other. Connor reached out and cupped Autumn’s cheek, drawing her closer so he could kiss her.
He kissed her.
They kissed.
Their first kiss, and I had a front row seat. Because I’d helped make it happen.
A cold lump settled into my gut and my skin shivered under the sweat of my run.
You made your bed, Turner. Now they’re going to lie in it.
Autumn
“Do we call this our second date?” Connor Drake’s grin was charmingly sheepish. “Or is it my second chance at our first date?”
