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Lex hides his growing smirk. “I don’t dare say what my brain thinks.”

“Enough you two. You’re killing my buzz,” Haden complains, his eyes never leaving the arena.

“Speaking of which, how on earth did you get Presley to agree to you coming here?”

Haden takes a sip of his beer with a dirty grin on his face. “I pretty much had to screw her brains out to the point where there’s no more sperm left in me. Her words… not mine.”

Lex breaks into laughter. “Me, too.”

“What? How is that even possible? It only took me ten minutes to get dressed until you said you had to help Charlie move some boxes in the attic to get to the special waffle iron because she wanted to make waffles.”

He shakes his head along with Haden, who’s laughing with his eyes still watching the wrestling.

“The waffle iron is in the pantry. But hey, thanks, cousin-in-law, for waiting around.”

Mental note—Contact realtor again and make sure they haul ass to find me a place.

That’s no different than the time I accidentally found ‘battery-operated goods’ in Mom’s closet while searching for some cash.

“Ten minutes, Lex? Really?” Haden queries with judgment.

“Twice. I had time restrictions.”

“Well, screw the both of you. I haven’t gotten laid since Kate’s and my second failed attempt. Can we change the subject now, please?” I beg of them.

“All right, Kate’s like a sister to me and also an employee of mine. Please, don’t talk about her in that way, let alone indulge me in any conversations that mention lesbian anal fisting again,” Lex states, disapprovingly.

“Ouch,” Haden adds, squinting his face on par. “Really? Anal fisting. She’s into that?”

“No… yes… I don’t know,” I say, not wanting to elaborate.

The girls move closer to us, and in one swift move, Miss Big Ass has pinned the other girl to the floor and has removed her bikini top. Her nipples are covered in mud. Wet and erect. Damn.

This beats watching The Notebook.

Ginger, one of the waitresses, serves my drink and lingers around. “So, boys’ night out?”

On cue, Lex and Haden lift their hands, revealing their rings. What a bunch of pussy-whipped fuckers. I down the drink in one go and grab Lex’s. Ginger is starting to look really lovely—blurry, but fuckable.

“And what about you?” she asks, lifting my hand to see it empty.

“Free as a bird.” I wink.

She whispers in my ear, leaning forward, “I get off in twenty minutes, and I’d like to get off with you.”

Fuck.

And as if that moment isn’t what I need, the guilt rushes over me so fast it almost knocks me over. She walks away, turning back to wink at me.

“Go for it, you need to fucking let those blue balls loose,” Haden tells me.

“Nice mouth on her,” Lex adds. “At least get blown if the guilt is too much to fuck her.”

I don’t want to continue feeling like this, and so somewhere during the final round of wrestling, I say goodbye to Lex and Haden and make my way over to the bar. Ginger is hanging up her apron and talking to another waitress. I blink my eyes repeatedly, the alcohol making it hard to concentrate, and pull out my cell, typing a message.

Me: I fucking hate you.

“You ready?” Ginger asks with her purse in hand.

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