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“But that’s not what everyone does.” The slight note of amused exasperation made him smile. “I try to do that, but it doesn’t come across the same way. You are special whether you like it or not, so stop arguing with me.”
“See there you go being bossy again.”
“I didn’t want to like you,” she said wryly. “You make it pretty hard not to.”
“It’s part of my charm.” And she couldn’t deny that he had some since she’d already admitted as much. “I don’t want to like you either.”
“Because I’m bossy.”
She stated it as a fact, as if that detracted from her sexiness. “Uh, no. I have never been threatened by an assertive woman. In fact, I’d go so far as to say that strong women are a turn-on. Because, you know, I can be a little hardheaded. You don’t let me run over you.”
He could sense her confusion as she contemplated him, though what she could actually see in the dark remained a mystery. “Then why can’t you just like me?”
“Because you’re engaged, Havana!” That had come out a little more forcefully than he’d have liked and also reminded him that he had no business being out here on this semiprivate balcony with Scott’s fiancée. “It’s plain wrong to think about you the way I do.”
Yeah, that was a stellar confession to tack onto the end.
She froze. “What way is that?”
Oh no, he wasn’t digging this hole any deeper. “Forget I said anything.”
The silence stretched to the point of snapping, and then she cleared her throat. “What if… I wasn’t engaged to Damian?”
“Hold your horses.” His hand flew up as if he could physically stop the force of her words. Nothing, however, could stop the very visceral reaction in his gut as he internalized the possibilities. Which was wrong. “I didn’t mention it to get you to do something about it! You can’t dump your fiancé for me. That’s crazy talk. We’re not… I’m not— Jeez, Havana. You can’t drop a thing like that on a guy.”
She had to fix it. It might already be too late. This was bad. So bad he’d have to go very far away because he’d never be able to look Scott in the eye again. He might not even be able to look himself in the eye again.
Her laugh did nothing to mellow him out.
“Relax. I’m not dumping him for anyone. The truth is… Wow, this is harder to admit than I would have expected.” She took a deep breath. “It’s fake. I asked him to play my fiancé to avoid unpleasant questions. I’m not even seeing anyone. And I have no idea why I’m telling you this.”
His whole world fell off a cliff as he internalized her meaning. Havana was not engaged to Scott. Havana was not engaged to anyone. She was single. One hundred percent free as a bird and he could think about her any way he pleased. In his arms. In the shower. Diving into the springs as she beckoned him closer with a laugh. All of it was okay.
Breath his lungs had been holding hostage rattled in his throat and came out as a cough. “Not engaged.”
“Not even a little,” she confirmed. “It’s exhibit A for why you’re not wrong about my obsessive need to control everything. If I’m engaged, there’s no chance something unexpected will happen.”
Blinking, he filled in those blanks faster than a speeding bullet. “Unexpected. Like meeting someone in the Dorito aisle you mean.”
“Yeah, something like that.”
Her voice trailed off to a low murmur that feathered across his skin, raising awareness that honed his senses to a fine edge. Heaviness in the air pressed down on him, but he couldn’t blame the weight of this conversation on the humidity. It was one hundred percent Havana who’d loaded everything with meaning and significance. On purpose? He burned to find out.
“Then that begs the question. Why did you tell me?”
“Because I want to see what it feels like to let go. Control is just an illusion, right?”
She’d swayed closer to him, so close that he could reach out and gather her into his arms with scarcely any effort. So he did. Her soft sigh fluttered across his Adam’s apple.
“I’ve been dreaming of finding my way here again,” she said.
More confessions of the variety he was coming to vastly appreciate. Especially since he’d been dreaming of that too. “All you had to do was say the word.”
“I don’t do this kind of thing well.”
“Which kind of thing, letting a man hold you?” She was a natural, melting into his embrace easily, as if she’d been formed to fit like this against him. “I’m not finding any issues with your technique, but I’m free all night if you’d like to spend time practicing.”
Her lips turned up against his throat, and he loved that he could feel her smiling. “No, dummy. Telling a man I’m interested. Letting things happen instead of trying to dictate every second.”
