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“Were you fishing for an older man?”
“No,” she said as a tear fell down her cheek. “I had hoped for a handsome young man who would be so enthralled with me that he wouldn’t care about my lack of fortune. Unfortunately, it seemed only the older men had that luxury.”
She felt him nod against her head.
“Very true in most cases, but I cannot believe there wasn’t one young man who already had inherited who wouldn’t have settled on you.”
“None that courted me. Of course the duke said I would be much happier with an older man who would take care of me instead of a young fool who believed in love.”
“Perhaps the duke was wrong in this case. Was he the one who introduced you to all your husbands?”
“Yes. He was very kind in the matter.” She rolled over in his arms and stared at him. His amber eyes sparkled in the candlelight. “And no matter what you may think of him, he only thinks of me like a daughter.”
“So you say.”
It was time to change the conversation again. “Now, I have told you two secrets and you have yet to give me one. You could start with a certain lady who broke your heart.”
He stared up at the ceiling. “Since you are already aware of the event I don’t believe this is much of a confidence.”
“Perhaps, but I am only aware of what the gossips have said. Were you in love with her?”
“In love with Mary Lewiston?” he mumbled. “I suppose I was. I was young and had never been in love with a woman. When she rejected me, I did not take it very well.”
“How so?”
“I started drinking too much and gambling. For a few months, I was a reprobate in every sense of the word.” His thumb caressed her arm as he spoke. “If it wasn’t for Georgiana, I’m not certain what might have happened to me.”
“Georgiana?” Was this another woman he’d fallen in love with?
“Neville’s young bride. She noticed my behavior and insisted I come down to Devon for a few months. She might very well have saved my sorry arse.”
Tessa smiled and then tweaked his bottom. “I glad she did. Now, you must tell me something no one else knows.”
He grinned at her. “Very well, hmm, a secret you say.” He closed his eyes and his face tightened. “I have never told this to another person, not even Neville, although, I have wondered if Georgiana guessed. I oftentimes fear I may have my father’s gambling problem.”
“Why do you think that?” She rubbed her thumb on his cheek and loved the feel of the new stubble on his face. It made him look devilishly handsome.
“The few times I have gambled, I enjoyed it too much. When I have won money, I haven’t wanted to leave. I always felt like I could win more.”
“What do you do then?”
“I usually lose all my winnings and then realize what a fool I am.” He opened his eyes slowly and shrugged. “I suppose the only good thing is I’ve never stayed after losing and have never indebted myself in the process.”
“How often do you gamble?”
“Never now. My only wagers have been small bets for fun. I am currently in a wager with my brother over the sex of his next child. I say this time will be a boy while Neville insists it will be another girl.”
“But wouldn’t you rather it be a girl?” she asked softly. “Then you would inherit if Lady Bideford cannot have another child.”
“No. I am the second son. Neville’s heir should inherit, not me.”
She smiled at his conviction in the matter. So many men would be praying for their brother’s wife to produce another girl and be done, giving them a chance for the title. “Will you look for an heiress to marry then?”
He looked away from her. “I suppose that would be the intelligent thing to do.”
“But...?”
“I rather fancied falling in love,” he whispered.
