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She’d been such a fool to let her intuition control her life so thoroughly. Her heart had always known that Nicholas was the man for her. Why was she so afraid to listen to it? She’d let fear of people’s opinion decide her life.
Whether he’d had only a few weeks to live or another fifty years, she should have stayed with him and enjoyed the time they had together. Now she wondered if she would even get the chance.
“Emma, you should come with me an
d let Miss Sophie care for your father,” Mrs. Griffon said as she entered the room with a basin of cool water.
“I don’t want to,” Emma said with a sniff.
“You need to go with your governess,” Sophie said and then hugged Emma again. “I will let you know if anything changes with him.”
Emma pulled away slowly and stared up at her. “Thank you, Miss Sophie.”
Mrs. Griffon led her charge out of the room. Sophie focused her attention on Nicholas. She dampened a cloth and placed it on his forehead. He whispered something but she couldn’t make out the words.
She sat on the bed and caressed his cheek, rough from the stubble of a day’s beard. “Oh, Nicholas, can you ever forgive me for being such a fool?”
He groaned slightly but said nothing.
“I should have trusted your judgment. You weren’t afraid of the gossips. You were willing to risk your reputation just to marry me . . . the bastard daughter of an earl who wouldn’t claim me.”
Tears burned down her cheeks as she stared at his handsome face. “I’m so sorry, Nicholas.”
He had to get well. She had so much she had to confess to him. And if he still wanted to marry her, she wouldn’t hesitate.
And if all he wanted was the baby?
She couldn’t think about that right now. First, she would help him get well. Then she would suffer the consequences for her actions.
“Sophie, perhaps you’d better allow us to care for Lord Ancroft,” Mrs. Griffon whispered.
Sophie turned to see both Dominic and Mrs. Griffon looking at her with concern in their eyes. “I need to stay with him.”
Dominic shook his head. “I can’t let you do that, Miss Reynard. You are putting your life and the child’s life at risk.”
Sophie frowned at Mrs. Griffon. “You told him?”
Dominic laughed. “No one had to tell me, Miss Reynard. It’s perfectly obvious that you are with child. Nicholas’s child, I can only assume.”
Sophie nodded. Even though she knew they were only being cautious, she couldn’t leave Nicholas now that he’d returned for her. “I know I should leave, but I cannot. I know about healing and from what you’ve told me this is not a long-lasting illness.”
“You’re still putting your baby at risk.”
“I can’t leave him . . . again,” she whispered the last word.
“He’ll be furious with me if you become ill.” Dominic looked over at Nicholas and then back to her. “Do what you think is best. I just want him well.”
She smiled up at him, seeing the friendship in his eyes. “So do I.”
“Do you need anything right now?”
“No, thank you.”
Dominic and Mrs. Griffon departed leaving her alone with Nicholas again. She removed the cloth and dampened it with the cool water. After placing it back on his forehead, she moved a chair closer to the bed and sat watch.
The silence of the room gave her more time to think about how foolish she’d been with him. Seeing him again made her realize just how much she loved him. She picked his hand up in hers and brought it to her lips. She rubbed his hand against her cheek, savoring the rough feel of his skin against her.
She couldn’t lose him now. God couldn’t be so cruel to her.
