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My fingers twitched with restlessness, anxious to get started. But this was her first day out of the animal clinic. She needed time to go through her things, to mourn her husband, and to accept this miserable world she’d woken in.
I glanced back at Jesse, and just as I’d hoped, his dark lashes lay over his cheeks, his upper body slumped, still and comatose, in its upright position. My heart gave a heavy thump. For him to let his guard down enough to fall asleep while guarding was a testament to his level of exhaustion.
No need to worry, though. My carbine sat a few feet away, and I knew Roark stood on look out at the front door. So I silently crawled across the floor and joined Jesse on the bed.
His eyes fluttered then snapped open in shock, locking on his bow beside him.
“Shhh.” I pressed against his chest and shoulder, coaxing him to lay down.
He pushed back at first then let me guide him to rest on our sides. Across the room, Shea ducked her head and picked through her makeup kit.
With my chest against Jesse’s back, I ran my fingers through his soft hair, trailing them over his face and smoothing out the creases in his forehead and around his eyes. Soon, his breathing evened out and his muscles grew heavy against me.
Shea watched us from the floor, picking at the skin around her fingernail, her voice quiet. “Is that how you tame him?”
I traced the outline of his short beard, marveling at the hues of brown and red. “This one can’t be tamed,” I whispered. “I wouldn’t want to anyway.”
“You said you have three guardians?”
With that question, our conversation took a somber turn, flowing back and forth in hushed tones. We talked about Michio. We shared stories about her husband, my husband, Annie and Aaron. Then we talked about the Drone.
I considered sliding to the floor with her, but Jesse hadn’t stirred and I was reluctant to give up such a rare moment of unguarded nearness with him. He looked so at ease and beautiful in my embrace with his jaw relaxed and lips slightly parted.
For the next couple hours, I combed my fingers through his hair and caught her up on everything I knew and some of the things I speculated. She was a natural listener, asked smart questions, and took it all in with astounding bravery. Not a tear in sight. Not even a tremble. She had just been told that ghosts existed and mutated bloodsuckers prowled the perimeter by the hundreds and the future was dependent on an unborn child.
Maybe she thought I was full of shit.
Still sitting on the floor, her legs stretched out in front of her, she stared across the room, her focus narrowing on the sleeping man wrapped in my arms. “I’m a believer. Practicing Baptist, actually. But the religious institution doesn’t really matter anymore, does it?” She smiled to herself. “Point is, I’m a woman of faith, Evie. If God has a plan, not you or anyone will be able to stand in His way.”
“Noted.” I gave her a half-smile and lowered my mouth to Jesse’s bare shoulder, relishing the heat of his back against my chest. “But I’m not a woman of faith, and I don’t think God has anything to do with who I have sex with and if I get pregnant. We don’t even know if women can carry to term. Or if a child can survive its first breath.” I swallowed, suddenly anxious to change the topic. “How are you feeling? No more nausea and headaches?”
She chewed on her lip. “I feel weak. Too damned skinny. I mean, look at these puny arms.” She tried to flex her bicep and sighed. “But I’m ready to get out there and help y’all however I can.”
Yeah, she and I were going to get along just fine.
“But there’s one thing.” She lowered her voice. “I don’t know if it’s because I haven’t had sex in two years, or if it’s from all the man meat you’ve got walking around up in here.” She glanced at Jesse. “But I’m itching to get laid. Like, for real. I’ve never been this horny.”
If Elaine experienced a heightened libido, she never mentioned it. But she did show it, with her hands and hips all over Michio. I wished more than ever he was here to answer Shea’s questions.
She squeezed her eyes shut. “Jackson, I’m so sorry, baby. I miss you terrible, and if you were here, I’d fuck you senseless. But you’re not, and I’m going to have to deal with this little problem without you. I love you. You know I do. Always will, baby.” Her lashes fluttered up, her eyes watery. She pulled in a deep breath and smiled at me. “I’m good.” She sniffed. “I’ll be fine.”
