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“Oh my god,” she panted as she reached the elderly woman. “Are you okay?”
The woman, who was probably no more than five feet tall, was bundled up so tightly that she looked like a little round ball. With her papery skin, her bright pink hand-knitted toque and mitts set and oversized winter boots, she was absolutely adorable. Her green eyes were still bright, even though her paper-thin pale skin was so wrinkled that she was probably in her mid-eighties. Her lips were pinched from the cold and the struggle she’d just been through.
“I’m okay,” the old woman said. She straightened her shoulders and set a hand on her purse. “The little bastard didn’t get it.” She flashed Muffy a knowing grin. “He wasn’t any match for me. Thought he could come steal from me, he did but he got shown. I’ve raised four boys and I have nine grandkids. They’re tough on a body. I’m no helpless biddy.”
“No,” Muffy laughed. “I can see that.”
The old woman’s eyes twinkled as her smile turned into a full-on grin that wrinkled up her entire face. She was absolutely adorable. “I’m Myrtle. Myrtle Brown. Thank you for coming when you did.”
Muffy’s attention was momentarily distracted by Alex, who ambled up behind her, her purse slung over his shoulder. He wasn’t nearly out of breath, but then again, he probably hadn’t run as hard as she had. He had his phone in his hand.
“I recorded it all,” he said. “If you want us to call the police, we will. They’ll probably be able to find him, based on the video.”
Myrtle slowly shook her head. “I doubt there’s a need. The little punk probably won’t try that again anytime soon. I just don’t understand kids these days. I know life’s tough, but there are places they can go and systems they can get on. Back in the day, we wouldn’t have dreamed of disrespecting our elders like that.”
“Okay, if you’re sure.” Alex hedged before he put the phone back in his pocket.
Myrtle nodded. “I’m sure.” She looked to Muffy. “This young lady fearlessly chased the scoundrel away. You’re my white knight in shining armor. My lady knight.”
“Oh no,” Muffy protested, her cheeks warming, like they always did when the attention was on her. “I just did what anyone else would have done.”
“I doubt most people would have run to help,” Alex interjected. “The guy could have had a knife or a gun. Most people would be too scared to get involved. We’re taught not to interfere, or we could get hurt.”
“That’s bullshit. I’ve always thought that was the most ridiculous thing. If he was trying to mug an old lady, I doubt he was badass enough to have a knife or a gun.”
“You thought of that on the spot?”
“No,” Muffy admitted. “But it worked out okay. I’m sure nine out of ten people would have done what I did.”
“I doubt that. Most kids are punks nowadays,” Myrtle chimed in. Clearly, punk was one of her favorite words to use.
Muffy could only shrug. She reached out and accepted her purse from Alex and slung it over her shoulder. “Can we escort you wherever you were going? To your house or to the store?”
“I was actually just out for a walk. Got to get my exercise. That was certainly more excitement than I was banking on though.”
“Maybe, in the future, tuck your purse into the inside of your coat,” Muffy advised. “It’s terrible that I even have to say something like that, but it would make you less of a target if they don’t spot it in the first place.”
“I should take up some of those self-defense classes. Could have kneed the bastard straight in the cunny if I had.”
Muffy coughed while right behind her, Alex let out a strangled sounding laugh that was obviously never supposed to escape at all. “I think you mean the balls, but yeah. Self-defense is probably a good idea.”
“My son has been bugging me about getting some training. I guess after today I have to admit he’s right. I just didn’t want to think that things are so bad that an old woman would be robbed in the middle of the park in broad damn daylight.”
“I’m sure anything is possible now,” Muffy said dryly. “I lock my doors as soon as I get into my car and I double check the apartment locks eight times an evening and we live on the fifth floor.”
“Gosh darn scoundrels,” Myrtle cursed.
“Bastards,” Alex agreed.
“Can we walk you home?” Muffy asked. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“Oh, I’m sure. I’m just fine, honey. I doubt he’ll be coming back, especially since you threatened the police and he probably saw your beau back there filming the whole thing. I’ve been walking this park for forty-five years and I’ve never had anything like this happen. I’m sure lightning doesn’t strike twice.”
