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Okay. Sick, caveman, plain weird. He didn’t have time to shake his head.
“Condoms?” He asked as he crested the bathroom door and rounded into the hall.
“I- uh… shit,” Alix cursed.
He couldn’t say why that made him so happy, but he wanted to fist punch the sky. He wanted to click his freaking heels… while carrying her. He didn’t stop to think that whoever she might have hooked up with in the past would have had condoms so she didn’t have to worry. He was not going there. He was never fucking going there.
“Chance’s room.”
They both said it at the same time. He snorted. She giggled. He set her down in the hall, half naked, fully naked himself. Her eyes nearly bulged when she got a good look at him. At his dick. The bastard twitched in response, as obviously his ego was getting stroked. Big time.
Alix let out a raspy breath. His cock twitched again.
Her eyes glowed. It felt like his cock was going to rip right off and chase her down the fucking hall.
“Have those jeans off by the time I get to your room,” he commanded in a voice that said he was totally out of control.
“Okay,” she breathed, so breathless that it implied that she was too.
He took off full tilt for Chance’s room, somehow managed to trip over his own feet, and flew headfirst into the nearest wall. He let out a string of curses that could rival even the filthiest sailor of old. He pulled back and inspected the five-inch dent he’d just put in the drywall. Whatever. He’d pay to have it fixed. It didn’t matter that his face was aching from literally breaking his fall. He’d been told he had a hard head. He had that to live up to as well.
He burst into Chance’s room. As usual, it was a pig sty. His mom probably had to come clean it up just to keep things from sprouting legs and taking over the house.
Ross checked the first obvious culprit. The nightstand. It was worn and beat up, even though it was basically brand new. He remembered the day Chance’s parents finally bought him a new bedroom set. Six months ago. He didn’t want to think about his parents ever having to know that he was so dirty, that he fucked chicks in his bed so hard, that he literally broke it and had to move onto other surfaces in the room.
Surfaces. Fuck.
There was a reason no one ever hung out in Chance’s room. For one, it was a pretty good chance that you’d actually contract an STD just by breathing the air in the place.
He fumbled with the nightstand drawer, trying not to throw up all over when he thought about Chance and Chance’s room and anything related.
The condoms probably weren’t even safe. At the moment though, he didn’t exactly care. He’d wash the fucking packets off. It beat running to the closest store completely butt naked and buying a box, because there was no way he was stopping to put his clothes back on and take them off.
The drawer gave way and there they were. A string of red packets. Ross ducked his hand in, carefully- though the drawer appeared mercifully clean- and grasped one. He tore it off and read the wrapper.
Extra large. Extra ribbed. Extra sensation.
Dis-fucking-gusting.
He never wanted to think about his best bud’s dick in any capacity. Whatever. It was going to have to do. As an afterthought, he grabbed two more.
He peeled out of the room so fast that he just about wiped out in the hallway a second time. He sprinted down the length of hardwood floor fast enough to make even the best athlete jealous. He burst into Alix’s room to find her trying to peel her tight, wet, evil, cock blocking jeans off of herself.
“They won’t come off! They’re way too tight because they’re soaked! They’re like one of those evil finger traps. The more you pull, the tighter they get!”
“Get on the bed.” He pointed at her twin sized bed. The same one she’d had since junior high when her parents bought her first bedroom set. She’d never had to replace her bed, thank fucking god.
She hobbled over to the bed and threw herself across the mattress, legs sticking off. She had one of those headboards that had the slats between, real wood, and she gripped it with both hands.
Right. Smart girl.
Ross threw the condoms onto the nightstand and grasped the offending jeans. He was two seconds from finding a pair of scissors and cutting them the hell off. Luckily, with a few tugs, the bastards gave way, tearing down Alix’s lithe, perfect, shapely, pale legs with a sucking sound. It was the sexiest sound he’d heard in his life because it left her completely bare.
