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He cupped her breast. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m late.” She pushed on his shoulders. “I forgot to set the alarm.”
“Relax.” He kissed her stomach. “I’ll tell Johnny it’s my fault.”
“You won’t do anything of the kind.”
She wiggled out from under him and rushed to the bathroom.
A knock sounded as she was brushing her teeth.
“Breakfast?” Ivan called through the door.
“No time. Go ahead and help yourself.”
She managed to shower and dress in ten minutes. When she stepped back into the room, the bed was made, and Ivan gone. She found him waiting downstairs with Mr. Whiskers in his arms.
“He begged to come inside, so I fed him.” There was a teasing but piercing look in his eyes. “Is this the cat you referred to?”
She escaped his penetrating gaze by turning very busy with pulling on her jacket. “It’s my neighbor’s cat. I’ll leave a window open so he can go when he wants.”
“No,” he said almost harshly. “It’s not safe. I’ll leave him in his own garden.”
Puzzled, she stared at Ivan’s back as he left with Mr. Whiskers, but there was no time for questions. Donald was already waiting outside. After Ivan left Mr. Whiskers next door, they exchanged greetings with Donald and got into the back of the car.
When Donald pulled off, Ivan took her hand. “Want to go out for breakfast? Johnny will understand.”
“I have an early appointment.”
“Stop at the Starbucks on the corner for brownies and tea on the go,” he instructed Donald. “Milk, two sugars.”
“You picked up bad habits in New York,” she said with a smile.
“You loved brownies for breakfast.”
He remembered. Why it made her feel both pleased and vulnerable, she didn’t know. She looked away quickly so he wouldn’t see the conflicting emotions in her eyes.
With Donald waiting for their order in Starbucks, Ivan gripped her chin and turned her face to him. “Thanks for letting me stay last night. I know you weren’t ready.”
She chose her words carefully. “I’m worried about you. These voices you hear, it’s not normal.”
“Don’t concern your pretty little head about what’s normal or not. I’m dealing with it.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Alice.” His voice turned hard. “Don’t start.”
“I want to help.”
“No one can help.”
“What’s wrong with you? I’m trying to understand.”
“It’s nothing you’ll understand.” He kissed her softly. “As long as you’re here, it’s bearable.”
“No matter what happened between us in the past, I don’t want this for you.” Through the window, she saw Donald crossing the road with a paper bag in his hand. “Please, Ivan, talk to me.”
“Hush, Princess.” He kissed her, again. “Let it go.”
They didn’t speak until Donald parked in front of the theater. As she made to open the door, Ivan held her back.
“I have a busy schedule today. I probably won’t see you.”
“Good luck, then.”
“I will see you for rehearsal, tonight.” It was an order, not a request.
He gave her a quick kiss, pressed the paper bag into her hand, and leaned over to open the door. As the car pulled away, his gaze held hers through the window.
Left standing on the pavement, she checked that no one was outside to see her. The last thing she needed was to be spotted getting out of Ivan’s car. Satisfied that there were no witnesses, she quickly entered via the foyer. At the elevator doors on her floor, she ran into Tilly.
“You’re late,” the secretary said. “Johnny is looking for you, and there’s another one.”
“Another what?”
“Vase.”
“Roses?”
“Twelve red ones.”
Alice walked into her office and regarded the blooming buds. Henry crossed her mind. Could he be her secret admirer?
“You’re running out of space,” Tilly said.
“Put them in your office.” She left her breakfast on the desk and made her way to the rehearsal room.
The voice coach was already waiting for her. With only an hour to practice, they started without delay. After a few warm-up exercises, she dove straight into the first aria of Con Te Partirò, Time To Say Goodbye. Ironically, it was a very appropriate song for her and Ivan.
The coach stopped playing the piano. “You have an incredible voice, darling, but now you’ve got to let it out. You’re pinching it here.” He tapped his chest.
She sighed.
“Again,” he said, all patience.
The singing lesson was shaky, to say the least. She didn’t know how she was going to pull it off in a day, not with her throat closing up every time she opened her mouth.
After punishing the poor coach for an hour, she went to wardrobe. The seamstress had agreed to adjust a dress for her. It was red velvet, fitting tightly over her hips and flaring out at the bottom.
Next, was an appointment with the makeup artist, who suggested they take up her hair with a tiara.
“How about diamond teardrop earrings for a dramatic effect with the lights?” the girl asked. “Is that what you want?”
Alice nodded absentmindedly. While the young woman was looking for accessories, Alice regarded her reflection in the mirror. What did she want? She wanted what Ivan could give her, each and every inch of his body and hard loving, but she needed more. The physical was great, more than great, but it wouldn’t be enough to last, not for a lifetime, not to grow old together. She needed care, and respect, and love. Was Ivan even capable of those things? They’d been obsessive about each other at school. Inseparable. Until he’d walked away that night. Was obsession the same as love? Even if Ivan would never love her, could she be without him, now that he was back, reminding her how good it felt in his arms?
