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But that was unavoidable now, it seemed, because he couldn’t think about anything else. He couldn’t think about anything other than Ava.
He shook water from his hair and let his hands dangle over his knees.
The fact was he missed her.
She was everywhere on the island. In his kitchen in the morning when he made coffee, on his deck when he stood beside the pool and searched for the silver phone he’d removed a week ago, in his bed at night when he rolled over and found it empty, on the beach... He wasn’t sure how she had infiltrated every part of his mind so profoundly in such a short space of time but there was no doubting that she had.
And if he kept up obsessing about her like this the next thing he’d think was that he was in love with her.
Hell.
He was in love with her.
Why keep denying it? He’d known it for a long time—he’d just refused to face it. Fear had kept him immobile. Fear of needing her more than she needed him. Fear of ending up a lonely shell of a man like his father. Fear of facing the fact that, yes, he had been just as devastated as his brother every time his mother had done her disappearing act.
‘Understood what, Wolfe? That you were a child who couldn’t rely on his mother’s love?’
Oh, hell.
His heart had known the truth. His heart had kept pushing him towards her. His heart had wanted to protect her and care for her. His heart had insisted that he trash his dodgy rules every time he’d looked at her. It was his head that had come late to the party.
But was it too late?
Wolfe stared blankly out to sea. The way he saw it he had two options. He could take the risk, tell her how he felt and hope she didn’t have guards cart him away, or he could keep his pride intact, travelling the world by himself until he slowly did become that empty shell of a man he had spent his life trying not to be.
He ran his hand through his hair. Hell, that wasn’t even a real choice.
* * *
‘I think we should make the announcement about your engagement to Lorenzo at the same time.’
Ava paused in the middle of scanning the acceptance speech she would read after her father announced his impending abdication and stared at him. ‘I disagree.’
‘It makes sense to combine the two. It’s more efficient.’
Ava’s lips pinched together. ‘That may be so, but I need to do this my way.’
Her father made a grievous noise that sounded suspiciously like a snort of disgust, but he didn’t push it, fussing instead with his military uniform before heading off to the state room where invited guests and the media waited for their arrival.
After double-checking her own outfit—a royal sash pinned diagonally to a satin gown—Ava followed him.
In the past few days they had grown closer than they’d ever been, drawn together by the devastating impact of Baden’s actions and a mutual commitment to ensure that he received the best psychiatric care possible. Her father had shown great fortitude in the face of his nephew’s betrayal, and Ava wished that she could grant her father this last request of her. But how could she?
Not only did it go against all of her hopes and dreams for herself, but her heart was so heavy she couldn’t imagine she’d ever be happy again.
Wasn’t it only fair that she worked to get over Wolfe before making the ultimate commitment to another man? Even if that man knew she didn’t love him?
But, really, she asked herself, did it matter? Her father’s illness had worsened with the stress of everything that had happened, and he was being forced to abdicate. Anders needed an heir... She sighed and came to a stop behind her father’s straight figure as he waited for the state room door to be opened. Her pining for unrequited love seemed trivial by comparison.
And Lorenzo was a wonderful man. He would make any woman an excellent husband, and maybe if she committed herself to him the pain of losing Wolfe would start to fade.
‘Okay.’ She stayed her father with her hand on his arm just before he entered the room. ‘Announce it.’
Her father frowned and swiped at the beads of sweat on his brow. Then he nodded. ‘You’ve made me very proud.’
Ava gave a small smile. She hoped her mother had heard that.
* * *
Thirty minutes later the large room was buzzing with energy after her father officially announced that Ava would be taking over as Queen in exactly a month’s time. Ava’s own speech, pledging to uphold and expand on her father’s absolute dedication to their country, had been a resounding success. The funny thing was she hadn’t once felt nervous or overwhelmed. Either she was more ready to take on this job than she had thought, or all of her nerves had been cauterised when she had walked away from Wolfe.
