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“So, I have to ask, did you see Darcy last night while you were out? Because it’s been a long time, hasn’t it?”
Of course, he goes straight for the jugular. I mean, he doesn’t even know that’s what he’s doing, he just knows how close we were, but his words leave me a little breathless. “Y… yes, I did. Briefly.”
“Oh, dear.” Dad’s expression darkens. “That doesn’t sound good. Was it not a good reunion? Did she have a man with her or something? Because I know that would hurt, even if you pretend otherwise…”
Oh… so maybe his question wasn’t so innocent after all. It seems that I wasn’t exactly discrete about my crush on Darcy after all back then, because even my non-observant father noticed it. How obvious was I? And how did we only end up kissing that one time? It’s crazy. We could have had a real torrid teenage love affair that I would always look back on with fond memories and a broken heart…if I knew that everybody suspected something
Actually, that doesn’t sound so great. Maybe it happened the way that it did for a reason.
“No man.” I shake my head hard. Thank God there was no man, I didn’t even think of that possibility! Perhaps I should have taken the time to check her ring finger. “It was just awkward, that’s all. Really strange.”
“Probably for the best,” Dad surprises me by replying. “She is the one girl that you could have actually fallen in love with, isn’t she? Given half the chance. And we all know how that works out.” He shudders hard. “Nothing good can ever come from love. It only ever leads to pain and heartache…”
Of course. I should have known that he was going to go there, he always does. My mother ruined him and turned him off love completely. I suppose it’s a miracle that the same hasn’t happened to me, but I won’t let it. She won’t destroy that for me as well, so I tune my father out as he starts his usual rant.
No, instead of putting me off telling Darcy how I feel, he has just encouraged me instead. I really want her to know. Nothing might come of it, but at the same time, it could be the start of something wonderful. I don’t exactly want to spend my life wondering what if anyway. It’s worth a shot. I want to try.
My mind wanders off and I begin thinking about ways that I could tell her in a romantic way, let her know how special she really is to me, and only one thing keeps coming to mind. The Christmas carnival. A staple of our lives and what has brought us here. But I can’t just tell her, can I? Nor can I just kiss her since that didn’t go anywhere last time. Instead, I need to prove that I can be better this time.
But what can I do? How can I make her see that I have become the man for her now?
The gifts… that’s a big tradition in our friendship group, isn’t it? The sharing
of presents. I don’t know if anyone will be expecting anything from me this time around, but I’m going to get everyone something amazing. I didn’t shop before I came here, which might have been a mistake, but that’s okay, I can make up for it. A lot of places remain open on December 23rd for disorganized people like me, who get things last minute. And I will get something for Darcy too, something special, to show her how I feel and what sort of man I could be for her. I don’t know exactly what I will get yet but I know that my journey will take me to the jewelry store because diamonds are a girl’s best friend, aren’t they?
A cheeky smile creeps up on my lips. Yes, this is going to be the best Christmas carnival of all time. I can’t wait for it…
Chapter Eight
Darcy
December 24th
I stare at my face, picking out a bit of a smudge with my eye makeup that looks more messy than smoky, but there isn’t anything that I can do about it right now, because my best friend is working on my hair, styling it in to a ringlet up do which has some curly strands cascading down my face in a way that’s cuter than I expected.
I don’t look my best, but then I won’t ever be able to look good enough for today because I’m utterly terrified about who I’m going to see at the Christmas carnival. In fact, I’m dreading it.
“So, there we go.” Ivy grins at me, pleased with her work. “You look wonderful.”
“Thanks.” I force a smile on my face, but I don’t really feel it. “I appreciate it, Ivy.”
Now that she’s done, she sits in front of me with a glass of wine between her fingers. I have my own, but I haven’t taken a sip yet. She gives me a strange look, almost as if she’s digging deep inside of me. I shuffle uncomfortably in my seat trying not to let her see everything going on inside of me.
“So, are we going to talk about the other night or what? Because I haven’t wanted to speak about it until we we’re face to face, so I can find out what the hell happened. Because that wasn’t like you at all.”
I sigh loudly and hang my head low. “I know, I’m sorry that I was so rude. I didn’t mean to be…”
“I just told Harry that you were sick, that’s all,” Ivy reassures me. “But I don’t think that he bought it because he knew that there weren’t any vibes between you two, which is a shame. He’s a nice guy.”
“I know!” I insist, feeling horrible now for the way that I took off at the speed of light without even saying goodbye. I was only thinking about myself and my need to get the hell away from Seth. “And I’m sorry about it. I didn’t mean to. I mean, yes I agree about there being no vibes, but it wasn’t that.”
“Okay.” Ivy leans in closer and eyes me curiously. “So, what was it then? Because you did look ill.”
I take a second before I blurt the word out. Mostly because I’m afraid to show the deep feelings that he has shooting through me. That damn dream didn’t exactly help things. The idea of him on top of me is too much. I can’t stop thinking about it and that’ll be all I can think about if I see him today.
Oh, who am I kidding, if? Of course I’m going to see him today. There is no escaping it. The Christmas carnival is a big event for the town, but it’s small enough for me to not be able to avoid anyone. Even him.
“Seth,” I finally whisper quietly. “He was there. In the bar. It seems like he’s back for the holidays.”
