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Maybe I should have kept it to myself, I think sadly to myself. If I hadn’t said anything then she never would have known. Maybe she could have just waited until the memories came back naturally…
But even that doesn’t feel like the right thing to do, discomfort courses through my veins at the idea of being so deceptive. She would have hated me more when she finally learned the truth… probably.
No, there isn’t any best solution here, just the advice that the doctor gave us. Routine, brain training, therapy… it all needs to happen. Damn it, by this point even the hypnosis therapy sounds like a good idea. Anything could work and for Tamara’s sake I’m willing to go through it all. Whatever she needs.
I hear a knocking at the door which makes me jump. Much as I’ve told Al that he has to be nice I’m not sure he can actually do it and I don’t want Katherine to run for the hills before we’ve sorted this.
“I have to go and be a buffer now,” I mutter quietly. “Wish my luck, I’m going to need it!”
I slide out the room quietly, pausing for one last lingering look over the raven haired beauty that I’m desperately falling in love with. Once all of this is over, I really hope we can get back to where we were.
“Why are you here?” Katherine’s shrill voice rings through the apartment. “What help can you provide?”
“Well, since you’re her best friend and she isn’t any better yet, I’m going to suggest more than you.”
We’re tipping over the edge already and we’re about three minutes in. My role as buffer needs to begin immediately if I’m going to get this on any sort of positive track. “Woah, guys, let’s just take a seat here.”
Katherine and Al do as I command and they fold their arms across their chests looking equally as pissed off as one another. It’s almost laughable, I cannot believe that I’m in this scene it’s crazy. But it isn’t truly that funny, not really. Not when I think about everything that I have to do. That we have to deal with.
“Okay, so as you know we’re here for Tamara.” God, I sound so formal, like a school teacher or something. “She’s spiraling worse and worse; her mood is only sinking further. We have to help her.”
“What happened in the bar? I couldn’t really understand you on the phone, you were all panicked?” Katherine leans forwards, forgetting about her need to keep her body language angry. Thank goodness, the quicker she forgets how much she hates Al the better as far as I’m concerned. “She hit her head with a wine bottle?”
“To try and get her memories back, yes, she thought a bump would work.”
“Oh no.” Katherine groans and throws her head into her hands. “That’s such a crazy plan.”
“The bar maid said she thought the bump got rid of it so it’d easily bring it back.”
We remain in silence for a few moments all of us thinking this through. The atmosphere is thick, it’s swimming around us, consuming us all in sadness. It shouldn’t be like this, not when things were going so well. There’s a small part of me that wonders if I’m the problem, if I vanished I wouldn’t be causing her worry, but I just can’t say goodbye to her. I can’t, she means too much to me, I feel too connected to her, she’s everything.
“Okay, so what do we do?” Katherine glances to me and Al. “How do we help her? This is all really bad stuff, and it’s only getting worse. She’s sinking, like you said, Logan, and I don’t see her pulling out.”
“The doctor has a health care plan he’s working on, we should get the details of that soon, but for now I think we need to do things to lift her spirits. We need her to be happier to help her recover.”
“And how exactly am I supposed to help with that?” Al sneers. “I’m nothing.”
“Dude, you are in this now, stop trying to get out of it. We can all spend time together.”
I see Katherine and Al both tense up at this, but thankfully they don’t argue. They refuse to look at one another, it’s almost as if they are opposite ends of the magnetic poles, repelling each other naturally, without even needing to try. How Tamara thought this might become something it utterly beyond me.
“So, where do we start?” Katherine asks. “Are you still planning your trip?”
I shake my head sadly. “No, not at the moment because routine is supposed to be the best thing so I thought it best to avoid it. Plus, I don’t know if Tamara is going to be too keen. She seems really… I don’t know, she’s off with me. I think not remembering our first meeting is really affecting how she feels about us.”
Katherine falls into an awkward silence and Al follows her. Neither of them know what to say about the possibility of our relationship failing. I refuse to accept that’s something that could even happen because it’s much easier for me to strive for something, to have something to work towards. I need this.
“We should start tomorrow.” Surprisingly, it’s Al who starts up the conversation again. “We should plan a day out, the four of us. Try to bring Tamara to a happy place. Is there anything she likes doing?”
“I…” I wish I had a solid answer for this but I don’t really. Not one I can be certain she’s in agreement.
“She likes the zoo, I do know that. We haven’t been for a while, either.”
I give Katherine a wide eyed look, surprised by this. I don’t know why it shocks me, really, many people like going to the zoo, but it’s just something that I didn’t know.
“The zoo, yes… we should definitely do that.” I dart my eyes towards my bedroom, sighing once more. “Maybe you should come over early in the morning, Katherine, if you don’t mind. So Tamara has got someone here when she begins yelling at me because I’m sure she won’t remember being brought here.”
“She can stay in my room, if she wants,” Al pipes up.
