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“And that is why, I think he might like me better,” I retorted.
“Eh, he definitely likes you better,” he replied hastily, in a way that slightly lessened the effect of my joke. “But he’s stuck with me…Speaking of which, if you’re able to move around on it today, we’ll work on it a little more for the next few days, but I’m hoping you’ll be well enough to get back down the mountain in a little while. From what I can see of it right now, the sprain seems to be healing nicely. I’m more worried about re-injury than I am about you not being able to make it. I just want to make sure you don’t overdo it too soon.”
“Thanks,” I answered, feeling the spark of a connection starting to take shape again. I grinned at him.
However, this time, he didn’t respond in a positive manner. He swallowed hard and put his plate to the side. His expression wasn’t angry, but it scared me.
“What?” I asked, my face falling to match his morose expression. “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah…I just…I feel like I have to tell you something,” Johnathan replied, putting his plate down on the ground and settling in to have a serious conversation.
Suddenly, the remainder of my breakfast was no longer appealing. I felt my stomach churn as I wondered what could possibly be so important, or so grave, that he would feel the need to be so serious about.
Since, the one thing I had learned about Johnathan was that unless he was angry, he
didn’t take things overly serious. He would rather insult a problem or tell it to go to hell wit his dry sense of humor than actually address it, which I was starting to get used to. Instead, though, right now, he seemed almost too serious.
“Johnathan, you’re scaring me…” I offered, pulling back from him.
“Good. You should be scared,” he scowled, “Cause it scared the shit out of me and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it.”
“What?” I asked, inching back toward him, although I felt my body shaking. I wasn’t sure what he was going to tell me and I feared that something would snap in him and I would be thrown back into a terrible situation, like I was at the campsite.
It wasn’t that I didn’t trust Johnathan, it was more that I was having a hard time trusting anyone presently. It seemed like every time I moved, since the incident, I was afraid something was going to attack me.
I didn’t want to live this way and my only hope was that it would get better with time, but I doubted it and Johnathan’s expression wasn’t helping this idea.
“So,” he started skeptically, as though he still wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell me what he felt he needed to. Yet, after a pause, he continued, “You know when I told you I found your tent and your bag? I told you that I didn’t find anything else?”
“Yeah?” I prodded as my heart started to thump loud and hastily in my chest. Instantly, I felt sick and the words spilled out of me before I could stop them, “Did you find the guy? Did you kill him?”
“What?” Johnathan seemed to be removed from the seriousness of the situation for a moment, as he shook his head. “No! Why would you think…” His voice willingly cut off there and his head bobbed in a motion as though he had answered his own question and no longer needed further explanation. “Uh…No. I didn’t kill him, but that’s partially only because I didn’t find him. I did find his bag…”
“His hiking pack?”
“No. Probably a bag that he had in his hiking pack. It looked like a medical bag? Kind of…Anyway, I found a knife, rope, duct tape and the damn drug he used to knock you out with in the bag.” He spoke quickly now, as though he was trying to get it all out before he changed his mind about saying any of it. “The good news is, the drug he used won’t have any lasting effects. It’s basically generic Valium, so it won’t have any lasting effects, but the other stuff I found suggests that…”
“He was going to kill me,” I replied, saying the words aloud made my stomach curdle. Again, I felt sick.
“Jesus, I’m sorry, Carrie. I wasn’t going to tell you, but I felt that you had a right to know…” He insisted, gingerly grasping my shoulder in an attempt to be supportive.
However, I wasn’t listening to him. Even though I had known that was a possibility, even as the assault was happening, the pre-meditation that had gone into the attack and the obvious, ultimate intention made my head spin.
Those eyes returned, burning into my soul and now that I was certain of their true intention, I was certain that I would likely never be able to rest comfortably and securely again.
If the guide had intended to kill me after he had gotten what he wanted, he would definitely want to kill me now that he was interrupted.
Thoughts of how my life was in danger, as well as Johnathan’s life flooded my conscious, making me feel guilty as well as terrified.
I wasn’t sure what I had thought happened to him before but the thought of him coming back for me wasn’t high on the realm of my possibilities. However, now, I feared that it was the only logical conclusion.
I supposed I had hoped this was a random act and that he was never going to try it again, because it had failed. I knew that was a dumb idea, especially now, but it was hard for my brain to contemplate anything else. Now, those ideas seemed like fantasies, wishful thinking, though I knew the reality was far darker.
As all of this weighed down on me, I felt increasingly lightheaded as the black curtain started to close from the corners of my eyes. I heaved a breath, which was useless, as though I was punched in the stomach and was certain that I was about to pass out.
I tried to fight it, refusing to close my eyes, but as the blackness closed over my vision, my stomach churned uncomfortably.
I wondered if it was better to pass out or fight it and throw up. Either way, I figured I would be getting sick, so I instantly decided I didn’t want to be throwing up after I had succumbed to the darkness.
